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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Beginning to see a side of MIL that I really don't like. Worried about flipping my lid.

5 replies

ScottyDoc · 08/03/2013 21:52

Was just sitting there today with her and at random times or when she's perhaps bored, she will start ranting about this that or the other. Today it was how dh needs a better job and to have more ambition (he is a professional with a decent wage) how his best friend has no prospects in life (shitty start, lovely guy who's trying to better himself career/life wise) bla bla bla...

This happens often and I'm aware from what I've heard myself and been told that she's had much to say about me in my absence. I do think she talks total and utter crap in all honesty, but a while back I constantly made excuses for her. I don't know why. She does not apologise for things and gets very defensive when you disagree with her. She's not the person I thought she was basically. I don't know what the point of my post is but I'm really disliking things she says. Sorry to ramble I just needed to get it off my chest :( I'm pg and the stress it gives me talking to her just doesn't feel good particularly now.

OP posts:
ZZZenAgain · 08/03/2013 21:53

ca n you see less of her?

ScottyDoc · 08/03/2013 21:56

No I can't ZZZen. It's a big cultural no no and they literally live down the road. Would look obvious. Get on well most of the time but its just these things she comes out with.

OP posts:
Hissy · 08/03/2013 22:31

Culture is never an excuse to put up with unwelcome, judgy behaviour.

Start making your own life a bit busier as far as MIL is concerned.

2rebecca · 08/03/2013 23:49

Agree with getting busier and letting your husband listen to her witter on. Women don't have to put up with crap just because men want them to do the boring stuff, that isn't culture it's sexism.
The sooner you start doing your own thing the less fuss there will be about you doing it.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/03/2013 07:53

Never mind how defensive she gets. If you disagree, pipe up. I think you have to treat whinging/crap-spouting bores the way you'd treat whiney children i.e. either ignore, distract or give them a sharp talking to and some time out. :) Assume the position of power in the relationship rather than hesitating or getting stressed just because she happens to be his mum.

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