Anyone feel humiliated and /or loss of dignity due to relationship abuse?

[superstarheartbreaker]

One of the worse things about being in an abusive relationship for me was the way it changed my behaviour in front of other people. Yes he did humiliate me himself but also made me loose my dignity due to the way he shaped me. As a result I behaved in ways that when I look back I find humiliating. I also felt that I suffered a loss of didgnity. I felt that the people who knew me at the time (uni friends and flatmates) didn't know the real me but aversion of me that he had manipulated. Anyone else feel the same.

a version

Yes, I find it very embarrassing.

How did he humiliate you? When did the relationship end? you are not alone

I do get what you mean, but for me, the beauty of leaving has been reclaiming myself and being the person I wanted to be. It sounds like I was quite a bit older than you when I got involved with my abusive ex, so it might have been easier for me.

You can't change the past, and there is really no point re-living various humiliating scenes. I think there's a Maya Angelou quote that goes: "When we knew what we knew, we did what we did. And when we knew better, we did better".

The relationship ended 10 years ago but my ex was very controlling around food (organic vegan...very strict) and I developed an eating disorder. I felt that the disorder wasn't me and I am now a happy non-organic omnivore! As a friend at the time put it; better to die young than under his so called health eating regime!

I find the eating disorder humiliating; it made me wierd around food, fanatical and isolated socially but I guess social isolation is part of what he was aiming for!