oh boy, long one so will try and summarise...not sure where to start
Husband has been depressed for last year - it's due to a bullying boss but he has been really short fused with me and the kids in terms of losing his temper and on a couple of occasions man handled the kids.
I got him counselling - he seemed better - still short fused but not aggressive. he then lost his job in decemebr and i thought he was going to haveva breakdown (to be honest it took its toll on me and i thought i was finally going under) So it's been tough times. We bought our house in October and used my savings of 60k but the mortgage isin his name as mortgage company said they wouldn't give me a mortgage as we put all our debts into my name in 2007 when I was made redundant - so at least one of us could keep a clean credit score.
We have three children 7,4 and 14 months. He has done some bad stuff like blew a shed of cash at a lap dancing club at a stag do in October and has been very hard to live with- screaming at the kids and a lot of yelling etc. Good news is that he got a great job offer on Friday, big Pay rise and everything he wanted. we had a fight last night over something really silly but he flew and whilst I admit I was tired and said god this is all so screwed up, to which he said get the fuck out of my house then. I said what did you just say and he said go on fuck off out of my house.
I went to bed we didn't speak but his morning he acted like nothing had happened and when I said you were put of order he said oh fucking get Over it. We took him for lunch but I have found it hard to look him in the eye all day. He drank a bottle of wine ( I don't drink) then I saw he had texted his mate who he went to the lap dancing club with saying are you about - we share a mobi,e at the moment as his company took his - his mate lives two hours away. I didn't say anything but later we talked about last night and I basically said that we have been through so much but he took it to another level and if he keeps saying that kind of thing then it's going to do some real damage. He said he agrees and that he wants some space band to celebrate so he's going to go away for a night (obviously pre planned) but was over the limit so would go tomorrow. anyway in short he ended up leaving tonight well over the limit - I said don't drive Ill get you a taxi to. Bnb or something but he said no- walked out on me and the kids - didn't say goodbye. Has no phone, I don't know here he has gone.
I am so tired. I feel completely at the end after the last year. The kids are fighting and crying fir their dad, I have no one to talk to. How did my life end up like this?