I'm not sure what I expect from this post, am I little bit in shock still.
Have NC but have been a regular poster on here for years, but don't want to out myself.
I've had odd feelings about my late mum's partner relationship with my DD (3) in that particular since she grew into a proper little girl, rather than a baby, he's taken more of an interest in her, and one that makes me feel rather uncomfortable.
A few things to mention, so you can get an idea of what my problem is, when the Jimmy Saville thing broke, he kept making comments about how grateful he was that I let him have a relationship with DD and didn?t stop him playing with her, this in itself wouldn?t raise alarm bells, but he mentions it every time we see him, and I?ve also since found out that his own family (he is not my father, and only been in my mum?s life the last 10 years) won?t let him spend time unsupervised with their young kids, especially the girls.
He also always hangs on to DD tickling her, even when she makes it very clear she wants him to let go, I?ve asked him in the past to respect her wishes and phrased it that we want her to learn that no means no. It?s not just friendly tickling, but more a strong hold on her, while she shouts to be let go, of course as soon as this happens I step in and stop him, but I feel I shouldn?t have to do this.
Recently during one of the tickle fights as he calls them, I noticed he had what looked like a bit of a semi on (for want of a better phrase) now I know guys bits can be hard to control, but it makes me very uncomfortable, and I now run constant interference to prevent him being able to get hold of DD ? am I over reacting?
The most recent incident which has upset me, he was taking photos of DD mucking about on holiday, and she started crawling about pretending to be a dog, DD has a bit of a belly and as a result often has a bit of a builders bum, so when this happened I asked him not to take a photo, but he still did claiming she had just bent down as he took the picture, which was rubbish as she?d been crawling about for a good few minutes at this point. I calmly asked him to delete the picture, but I cannot be sure ? I wanted to take his camera and check but I was so cross with him, I may have done something stupid like smash the damn thing.
I?ve had issues with him myself in the past, he always insists on kissing hello on the lips, I always try to turn my head, but it still creeps me out, and there was also an incident when I was visiting him and my mum, when he accidently walked into the study where I was sleeping, with the excuse that he got the rooms mixed up ? in his own house (which he?s lived in for over 40 years) ? Really?
I don?t know if I?m overreacting, but I can?t stand him being anywhere near DD now, and I will be making sure I avoid this at all costs, but I guess my question is ? what do I do about him, I?m worried that maybe he does have a liking for young girls/children (given his family?s reaction to him ? fwiw he has no kids of his own). What do I do, what should I do, how do I confirm my suspicions, I don?t want to make a fuss if I?m just being over protective, but on the other hand, if it is something more sinister, I would hate myself if I did nothing and something awful happened later down the line.
Sorry this is so long, and thank you if you made it this far