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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is it best to "surprise" DH and come home with short hair?

37 replies

Watfordsue · 04/02/2013 14:06

Hi Girls, I am in a dilema about what to do about cutting my hair. Like most men DH likes it long but I am so desperate to cut it I am scared he will talk me out of it. I am very petite and I always had Pixie cuts till I was about 19 and then grew it as boys liked long hair. Since having DS1 six years ago I started wearing it simply all scraped back in a band permanently off my face, This was great and easy especially when DS2 and DD1 came along! When we manage to get out together I try to make the effort with the heated rollers and wear it loose and curly, DH thinks its sexy. When DD was two last year I felt I needed a job as after spending years with babies I was short of adult conversation and when DH came home it was always baby talk. I managed to get a perfect Part Time job in a local cafe, I absolutely LOVE it, I have gained confidence, got my slim figure back, I feel I am contributing to the family and most importantly I feel so much better about myself. The only problem with working in a cafe is the smell........I come home and stink of food all over me. I tend to shower every morning and again quickly when I get home but the problem is that I just don't have the time to wash my hair daily after work and it stinks of fried food all the time. Even though its scraped back I can smell it round my face and my bedding and pillows stink also. I feel going back to a simple Pixie cut would be perfect, 30 seconds blowing and I will feel great, the problem is DH, if I mention that I would like to cut my hair short, he will probably say how much he likes me long and I will feel guilty cutting it, the other option is to just have it done after work, he then comes home to a sassy new wife and I just surprise him. My friends are undecided on what is best to do, they also have husbands who like long hair! My Mum who went through the same thing with my Dad said it was 10 years before she finally cut hers, I can't put up with this that long. Mum came out with a good line and said, " You are nearly 30, a big mortgage and 3 kids, what can he do!!"

I would appreciate advice on what to do.......

I have posted this on two boards as I am unsure which is best.

Thanks

OP posts:
Steadyonthere · 04/02/2013 21:25

LOL @ Apocalypto

schmoodles · 04/02/2013 22:35

Ha this has to be a journalist or a wind up.

smallnotfaraway · 05/02/2013 00:05

I hate my long hair smelling of cooking when I'm cooking, so I tie it back and wear a headscarf, which keeps the smell off my hair. However, I can understand why you crave the convenience of quick-dry short hair - washing long hair is a pain, and when I had very short hair as a student, I really appreciated that aspect. Wouldn't go back to short hair now though, as I find my longer hair gives the appearance of youthfulness (and I am not young).

However, you sound like you'd just prefer your hair short, and while you're still only 30, a pixie cut is still likely to look cute and not too mumsy, as you're petite, and you know that it's a style which suits you. I do think you should let your DH know that you're going to the hairdresser first though - and tell him it will make you feel like a teenager again :)

Ragwort · 05/02/2013 08:03

while you're still only 30, a pixie cut is still likely to look cute and not too mumsy - I finally got rid of my pixie cut when I was 50 - hate to think what you lot would have thought of my appearance, or even now with shoulder length grey hair Grin .

diddl · 05/02/2013 10:10

Ragwort-you have the "hairstyle" that I´m heading towards!

I currently have shoulder length dark brown hair-with the odd white/silver hair.

smallnotfaraway · 05/02/2013 17:08

LOL @ Ragwort - All I meant was that a pixie looks REALLY (honestly, truthfully) best with a youthful face with a petite frame, like the OP has, and that 30 is definitely young :)

Personally, I have about 20% silver long hair (not coloured) and am well over a decade past 30.

MajesticWhine · 05/02/2013 17:20

I think do it without telling him before. He might love it in reality when he sees it, but would probably be negative about it if you forewarn him and give him a chance to think about it.

BIWI · 07/02/2013 20:08

I'm wondering, now, if this is some kind of experiment - to see what kind of responses you get if you post in Relationships as opposed to Style and Beauty. Hmm

As stage two, try posting in Feminism.

waltermittymissus · 07/02/2013 20:14

You'd be better off posting this in Feminism. They'd love to help you out...

Watfordsue · 08/02/2013 01:30

Hi everyone, thanks for all your comments and advice. I think I came over a bit soft, I certainly don't do as he says, in fact he has never told me to do anything, however I agree it is my appearance and as such I will decide. The reason I was a bit hesitant is because we do both like to please each other in many aspects of our relationship. Anyhow, I have sorted out the issue, I have decided to have a beauty spa day package together with my cousin, for facials, nails, brows etc.... including a new hairstyle. I have told DH that I will be coming home looking like a new wife, he was pleased and said have a great day! Some of you may think I am mad but I feel better at least warning him. So, we will book it for next Saturday and see how it goes.
Thanks for all your advice.

OP posts:
jynier · 08/02/2013 03:31

Aaw, "OP* Such a sweet post!

jynier · 08/02/2013 03:33

Whoops! Fat fingers" Should have said, "Aaw, OP Such a sweet post!

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