My lovely friend is having trouble in her marriage. Her husband has basically just withdrawn from family life. They have no sex life, everything they do is. separate. She earns more than he does and I think that may be galling to him. She wants him to leave but he refuses. He also refuses to talk or go to counselling. They have 3 dc's and he has one one hand blurted out to the dc's that he's leaving and on the other hand told my friend that he won't go anywhere.
Many moons ago (before dc, so more than 10 years) he was violent towards her when he'd had too much to drink. He is now drinking a lot again and she is worried for obvious reasons.
She has told her family the situation and they are supportive but reminded her 'he is still their father' etc which she knows and wouldn't want to stop contact between them. She wants to be civilised but he won't do anything one way or the other - leave, or seek help, or try harder.
I appreciate its none of my business but I want to support her and be there for her. I've offered to have the children to give them a break and I try to be a sounding board and an ear for her.
Please could you help me with advice on what I could do to help - practical things and places to go for advice and things that people have said or done for you, if you've been there, which helped.
I am worried for get and her dc's but my gut feeling is that you get one life and you should live it. She is only existing in her life at the mo. 