Drink problem?

[MistressMary]

Lordship likes his Jack Daniels And Coke. He has for over a year.
Recentley I have noticed how many drinks he has. He always has a JD and coke every night. If on the rare occassion we do got out he has around three doubles.
I notice how many empty 70cl bottled I put out for recycling. Have said to him "you need to start thinking aboout your health and what you eat and drink a bit more"
He asked me to get him a bottle on Friday as we had none in. He gave me the money and I obliged.
He had a drink that night, we went out last night and he had three doubles, poured out another one when we got in, apparently according to MIL he never drank it. She poured it away this am. Tonight their is an empty bottle sitting on the side to go out for recyling.
I think I'm right in being concerned. He seems to be reliant on this to relax him.
How do I deal with this sensibly?

I dont think Men are very able at taking a look at what they eat and drink.Can you have a general chat to him about alcohol,dont be all accusing as he may be all defensive....I havent got a problem...he may not have.
We all have different drinking habits.I think a bottle in a weekend is a concern,but that is my opinion.
Alot of Men rely on a drink to relax them.
Do you think he may be heading for a slippery slope?

Do something similar to what lynett did on Desperate Housewives, keep the bottles over x amount of time & ask him "is this amount acceptable over x amount of days" see if it shocks him.

My drink is JD & coke but I have never upended a bottle in a weekend.

I think you are right to be concerned; using drink to "relax" (he is in effect self medicating with alcohol) can lead to problem drinking in itself which was not initially intended.

Al-anon could probably give you a few pointers with regards to his drinking.

Denial of the problem can be an issue also when it comes to people who drinking becomes a problem over time.

This is another website that you could read also:-
www.patient.co.uk/showdoc/27000115

Al-Anon Family Groups UK & Eire
61 Great Dover Street
London
SE1 4YF

Tel: 020 7403 0888

I don't think one drink a night and three when you go out is excessive for a man. I agree we should all watch our drinking and be aware of health but it's too easy to yell 'drink problem' every time someone raises a glass.

It does not sound excessive to me. Have you tried counting his units?

He used to roll a joint and he did have a Coke problem once over, which he kicked years ago.
So this may be a substitute, I feel it's a problem.
So that's a problem in itself.

Thanks for everyones input.

I can understand your problem with this as my husband loves a drink.

He will always have cans in the house and will have a few each night and on the weekend he does binge drink as he is a keen rugby player so during the session he is always up at the club with his mates getting drunk!

I did think he had a problem at one point as I thought he couldn't even go 1 day without having at least 2 cans of lager but after having a chat about it he said that if they did alcohol free lager that tasted the same he would drink that instead. He didn't drink to get drunk but just liked the taste!!(?)

I told him that I thought he maybe becoming dependant on it and with that he got all high and mighty and said that he would prove he wasn't getting a problem and for a whole 2 weeks he didn't touch a drop of alcohol! Yes he missed it but he wanted to prove a point - maybe he needed this point proving to himself as well?!

If your husband was secret drinking or hiding bottles over the house etc then I would diffenatly get concerned but as he is drinking it in front of you that is a kind of good thing!

Have a chat and see how it goes but don't rush in saying you think he has a problem. Good luck

I don't think it is particularly excessive either. But if it is worrying you then you need to address it.
My dad was a big drinker when I was growing up and it affected me very badly whereas it never worried my older brother at all.
It was nothing for my dad to drink 24 bottles of beer and then to start on spirits in one sitting. Luckily my mom said it was her or the drink and he chose her and hasn't had a drink in over 15 years!
He did go to AA for a long while.
Hope you get it sorted.
Jo x