Can you trust anyone these days?

[tedsmam]

Feeling a bit despondent today.

Help me see the light, if there is any?

DH recently went through a "I don't know if I love you anymore" crisis...seems to have blown over now, but shook me all the same.

Best mate has been seeing one of her DH's friends on the sly for FOUR years I have just discovered. Kids involved on both sides. Neither intends to leave partner but just carry on with the affair and see what happens / what carnage ensues....

Colleague / Good friend at work is dropping me right in it by taking a "holiday" at short notice -leaving me with tons of extra work and short staffed - I have since worked out that he is off for a dirty short break with someone HE is playing away with - four kids between them and 2 partners who are none the wiser. He admits this, and is just a bit pissed off that snow may bugger their plans up, but shows no guilt whatsoever about what he's doing ........

None of which is any of my business - apart from DH of course - but all of which impact on me by playing on my mind..

Can you trust anyone to just be honest anymore? Or am I just unlucky and a bad judge of people I choose to call my friends.......

Indeed, you are so right Voiceofunreason.

Thinking of sacking off the human race and just living with labradors.

I think technology is definitely playing into it - just unwanted porn/dating/sexual liaison websites the "what ifs" my partner is pissing me off today. Sexting. People are so uninhibited on social media - it is all about them - letting people know far more than would be revealed in normal life and the self importance of their life experiences. Obviously emotional and sexual fidelity have taken a massive slide because more working together of men and women... and the general but it's my life and I only have one... sod everyone else. And as for phone addicts and their prioritisation of any and I mean any text over real life interaction - just so shallow and disrespectful. It all somehow melds together to create a new form of social interaction.

I don't think it is technology at all. People have always played away from home and they always will.
If you are of the mind to crossfuck, you will find a way.

Hmm Gay, I think you're right to a point, there have obviously always been adulterers and the serial adulterers would be doing it anyway.

However, I do think there is now a large contingent of people to whom "it just happened". People who found there was a little twinge of something that would have been long forgotten before they next met are now able to keep in touch by sending short chatty texts as friends, when previously it would have required the "effort" of a phonecall to home or office that would have been overheard. The friendly texts develop and before you know it they're "in love". Happens to perfectly decent people who think they can control it to start with and then find they can't. They don't set out with the intention of having an affair and they certainly don't want to hurt their OH.

The thing is now though that your husband could be sitting next to you on the sofa watching the same tv programme and carrying on via text or online chat with a woman who's sitting next to her husband on the sofa. That couldn't have happened in the past.

I do think technology has made people a lot less respectful of others. Like someone said about the phones - it's incredibly disrespectful when you're talking to someone and their eye keeps turning to their phone and then, because they are totally addicted, they start to send a message right in the middle of your conversation. And no, they can't (as they claim) multi bloody task - they stop listening to you altogether while they text, a little smile playing around their mouth, and then when they've sent it, their mind is on the potential reply.

It's so incredibly rude. And no, I'm not going to accept I'm a bad conversationalist because people do this! It can happen when you're telling someone how to do something at work, or when you're telling a friend something that's happened to upset you.

Glad to get that off my chest!