I am hoping someone can offer advice and support.
I met my DH 5 years ago; we have lived together for just over 2 years and got married last year. He is 50 and I am 48. He has 2 grown up children, aged 26 and 29, from his first marriage which ended in divorce when they were 8 and 10. I have 4 sons, the oldest is at uni, the others are 17, 15 and 14, all in school still. I was married to their dad but we divorced, and though I had a boyfriend, I never lived with anyone so basically I was single from when youngest was 4 until I met my DH.
When I met my DH he was a successful businessman. Looking back I see some warning signs that he was a bit of a navel-gazer, but he was warm, generous and funny. He made me feel lovely, and it felt like doors opened and I saw everything differently. He got on well with my children.
He couldnt be happy til we lived together, he hated my house, so I moved out and in with him and the boys all went to new schools, and did very well. Unfortunately I could not find a job locally, since the house is in the middle of nowhere, and I commute 60 miles each way to work every day. I have to work.
I have not been able to sell my house, and a short term tenant wrecked it so it is not currently sellable.
About the time we moved in DH changed. Suddenly he seemed exhausted all the time. He stopped doing anything with his business, which is now basically bust, and became a slob. Eventually about 6 months ago, he was diagnosed with depression. He has medication, but avoids the counsellor as she sets him tasks which he does not do.
I think I love him but it is hard to keep loving him. He is lazy, quite literally sits on the sofa in pyjamas farting for days on end, has gained 4 stone in weight, and is foul to everyone, my youngest son especially.