Porn Opinions

[sausageroll25]

I'm just after peoples opinions really. Nothing terribly wrong just concerned a little.
Ive been with dp for just over two yrs,he has had few problems with ED, he says it takes him a while to get used to a new partner.

Recently though we needed a new laptop,so he bought one. I had my own I bought with me when I moved in with him ( so he never really used it and it was incredibly slow) now he has this new one.

One of the first things he looked at was porn, which I dont really have a problem with , quite curious myself sometimes.

But what concerns me is the amount he looks at it now. Its everyday and whenever I'm not about, or before I get back from work etc.

He found it hard to 'finish' (sorry) during sex for a few times lately, I know he's not masturbating cos its a bit of a (sexist) joke on his part but he says thats what Im here for and he doesn't feel the need.And I do believe him as he's open with me about that.

How does it affect mens heads/bodies by watching it? Any ideas?

:)

I just read the OP to my DP. He gave a puzzled look and said:
'He's wanking. What is the other purpose of him watching porn?"

Which is pretty much what everyone else has already said. Except the more unusual posts.

Snuff? Whaaaaat?
How is that relevant/normal/an anticipated situation?

I think that deep down you know when there is a problem. My ex was obsessively addicted to porn. I spent years trying to justify it/ saying I didn't mind some of it etc etc . He had ER too. It wrecked us in the end (the addiction, not the ER). In hindsight of course I knew there was a problem (though I didn't know the half of his addiction at the time). I think listen to your instincts. If there is a problem enough for you to post on here, then there is problem enough that you need to address it. Underneath YOU are not happy with it. My ex was/ is completely screwed up, with a severely warped view of women/ relationships. I'm not saying that your partner is the same, just that I spent many years ignoring my gut instincts. Something is bothering you and I would try to get to the bottom of it.

ED not ER!

"he is very emotionally detached,but im sure he still loves me in his own way"

Sorry but I tend to be suspicious of people who claim to 'love in their own way'... it usually means they're behaving quite badly but the other person, desperate for any sign of life, is trying to see 'love' where it simply doesn't exist. Emotional detachment is a selfish response when all you're asking for is love and affection

A bad sex-life is pretty soul destroying. Porn usage in a partner (for some) can be a real assault on their self-confidence. The fact that he dismissed your concerns and said he'd carry on regardless is extremely disrespectful. For the sake of your self-respect you'll have to tackle this one assertively and not accept sulking or keep making excuses for him

I think porn is okay if you and your partner are still enjoying a good sex life together and if the porn is 'normal' i.e no animals, young women or really weird stuff. As for snuff - WTH?! That's not porn it's murder, pure and simple! If i found out my partner was watching snuff porn I would leave immediately and be very worried for my safety.

If porn is becoming excessive or if one partner is feeling neglected due to the other partner's use of porn then that is an instance where it is not okay and needs to be talked about. Similarly, if one partner has voiced their concerns/dislike of porn and the other partner continues to watch porn regardless, that is also not okay.

If someone watches porn everyday then I would probably say something as that seems like an addiction to me.

Did you know, that porn (excessive, addictive) causes ED?

This is a surprisingly little known fact: HOW MUCH it burns out the pleasure centres of the brain/hardens porn users to real relationships