For a friend - any book recommendations

[foreverondiet]

Hi - a close friend of mine was in an abusive relationship for almost 20 years - including lots of physical abuse (when she ended up regularly being badly bruised - he got drunk and then beat her up ). Sadly she didn't report him for ages but eventually did and has managed in last 5 years to get divorced from him. Luckily she is not in contact with him anymoreandheisin-prisonforassaultingsomeoneelse).

She has met someone new, I haven't actually met him but they have been friends for a couple of years and now she is going to move him with him - I am very happy for her - however, she is very concerned as she hasn't managed to sleep with him - she thinks as still traumatised from previous relationship. I'd like to help her (esp as she has confided in me) but am totally out of my depth with this, and wonder how to get her help.

Any wise words?

No she hasn't had any counselling - and I suspect the cost of counselling would be part of whats put her off, so good to know its free. Also that she is embarassed by thus, but she knows that whilst her new boyfriend is very very patient, and a good man, she does have to find a way to resolve - which is why she told me, as I helped her to get out of abusive marriage - yes was eye opening to see how hard to get out, especially when money is tight - she was / is my cleaner, and when I was on maternity leave with my now 6 year old DS we spent a lot of time chatting which is how we became close friends.

Thanks for idea - will call MIND and I also thought about Relate - yes, RL help much better than book.

Added issue that English not her first language (although her english in ok - we chat in english, and she speaks to her boyfriend in english, just she's not 100% fluent) so definitely better to speak to someone that read book.

Ok - presumably need to go to GP to get free MIND NHS counselling?

Yes, I hope so too, as after all she has been through she deserves to be happy.

ok great good to know.

I would suggest she access a freedom programme course..they are normally run by children's centres. That will help her with recognizing abusive relationships in the future and help her with her past relationship. I found a book called dragon slippers was very good too.