Men With Girlfriends Wanting Attention From Other Women

[LessMissAbs]

Mainly platonic. What do you think and does this happen to other women on here/how do you deal with it?

Man 1: have just come back from a group training holiday (I do a sport) and man there announces he fancies me but can't do anything about it as he has a girlfriend. No idea why he doesn't holiday with his girlfriend. Spent the whole time with me, being very nice, touchy feely, complimentary, and seemed a bit strange on the last night, but nothing happened as (a) I went to bed (I like my sleep) and (b) I don't drink.

Man 2: Training holiday last year, much the same behaviour, very attentive, cooking my meals, taking me out for drives in the hire car. On return, saw me with my DH (whom he knew about), looked enraged, two days later announces to mutual friends that he has a long-term girlfriend that no-one knew about and ignores me. Now is speaking to me again and seems to want to flirt with me at sporting events, which tbh, I can't be bothered with.

Whats up with them? Why? Is it ok to be some platonic ego boost for these guys? How do others deal with them?

You seem totally passive in these situations, as though you feel obliged to accept their attention. You can just ask them what their game is, they won't burst into flame. You can also refuse to spend time with them, ask them to cut out the flirting or question them on their behaviour (such as when guy seemed enraged to see your DH). Women aren't just objects for men to play with in order to get a "platonic ego boost."

I deal with it same way as I deal with any other person - I judge whether I like them or not, and I ask them to stop anything I'm not happy with. If I don't like them I don't spend time with them, and generally I don't like men who are attached but who still flirt outrageously - it gets so boring.

Thanks CailinDana thats the kick up the bum I need. It is boring, and a bit annoying.