Something iffy going on???

[RoxyLady]

Partner and I together 8 yrs with a 2 yr old
Every night I pick him up from the station with my daughter.
Last week he said he was on his way home.... So an hour passes and no call to say he is ready for me to pick him up. Its
Nearly 7pm my daughters bedtime. I ring him and he is out having a drink. Im pissed because 1) my daughter has to get ready for bed 2) he has
Me waiting around while he is out drinking.
Note i really dont care if he goes drinking its the fact he doesnt tell me
What he is doing.
We spoke about this last week and i thiught he understood.
Anyway. Tonight he does the same damn thing. He comes home. I try not to get into it with him but then he has the audacity to complain about something left out on the side. (Im 2 minths preg with worst morning sickness) trying to run my house too.
I tell him I dont know where he gets off complaining when he hasnt apologised for doing the same thing twice in a week. Henstarted swearing and shouting at me. VERY out of character. Throwing the F word around saying he doesnt have to apologise for shit. Im astounded. Am I out
Of order? Does this not stink of something iffy going on?

I'm not sure what you mean by something iffy going on - but it's horrible behaviour.
I would start by not giving him a lift again. Really. Not until he 'gets it'

I agree with Thisis. Inconsiderate behaviour. If he is drunk I would wait til he calms down/sobers up then talk again.

Iffy as in the way he reacted. Was so defensive and out if character.

No he isnt drunk. I was cooking he dinner when he started swearing at me so i left the room. He carried on cooking and ate the dinner. Want to ram the plate down hos neck

Hope you are ok btw Roxy, and congrats on pregnancy

it is a red flag when someone starts acting out of character . Is this the only indication you have or are there other 'odd ' things happening? Eg keeping his phone on him all the time etc

I would leave him to calm down then speak to him again about it. You did the right thing leaving the room.

Does he work? Is he having problems with his job maybe?

It goes way beyond 'iffy'. You're quite right - he's being defensive, aggressive and obnoxious. Swearing and shouting because someone's asked you to let them know if you'll be late is a complete overreaction. You've hit a nerve somewhere. It could be something sinister going on or it could be something as childish as a mate taking the piss because he said he had to be home for his DD's bedtime.

An apology and an explanation seems the minimum requirement.....

Sounds like a guilty conscience to me

Roxy

Nothing really has changed re you and he over the last couple of years and you're now bringing another child into this.

Honestly, why are you with this man at all?. Your relationship history together is problematic to say the very least. You should not be together at all. What did you learn about relationships when you were growing up?.

What do you get out of this relationship now?.

All this man cares about is him and he alone; you and any children you have together are but of secondary concern to him. He could well be acting like this as well because he has another woman on the go.

I wouldn't necessarily jump to the conclusion he's got someone else on the go, but then I don't know him and your relationship background.

It could be something playing on his mind, maybe worrying about a new baby being added to your family and he's worrying about the changes it will bring? Could be something at work that's stressing him out?
I'm not excusing him as there is no excuse for being that rude and disrespectful, just saying don't jump to the he's cheating conclusion immediately.