It's complicated, I don't want to drip feed, and I've had enough of everything.
Split up from very violent and controlling and cheating ex when i was 7 months pregnant, went to the police and he was arrested for ABH, GBH, attempts to kill, false imprisonment and a few other charges relating to everything. Ex pleaded guilty to 20 out of the 26 charges. After he was arrested he was diagnosed with Aspergers and under lying mental health disorders, because of this he escaped prison, just.
Fast forward 2 months and DD was born, ex had been in intensive counselling and on medication since being arrested and seemed to be improving so was given supervised contact when DD was 2 days old (still in hospital).
Supervised Contact was agreed between ex, his support worker and I to be once a week at a contact centre for 2 hours, this worked well with only a few minor problems for around 4 months.
When DD was 4 months old, the contact centre closed down, so we changed contact to a young parents group (ex is younger than me at 22) so it was still supervised but less formally. I was a bit wary but again this has gone well.
However a few weeks ago, ex took DD out of the group to see his mum in town, when i challenged this he became quiet nasty and threatening so i said if she wants to see DD then she can ask me, (we're friends on facebook) and we can arrange a time ourselves, to which he told me to stay away from his mum and to leave her alone. As far as I'm aware he hasn't done this again.
Ex and i have very limited contact besides confirming contact but when we do, i try and be civil, he however has made it clear he does not regret anything he's done and blames me for everything that has happened. I assumed that this was just par for the course and ignored it however a friend who works with his Mum in a local supermarket recently over her talking on the shop floor saying things like 'No wonder he's developed aspergers after spending 2 years with her.' 'No wonder he kept her in if she flirts with everyone with a pulse.' 'Well if she was willing he wouldn't have strayed.' 'she thinks she's so much better than everyone else because she doesn't drink, smoke, swear, does volunteering and is doing a degree. But her little miss nice girl thing she has going on is just an act, she's really a prick teasing whore.' As you can imagine this really upset me as I had no idea me ex's mum felt so strongly against me, it also upset me that she said it at work where anyone would hear.
So yesterday ex was meant to have contact but DD now 9 months, had a temperature and D&V so kept her home, she wasn't allowed at the group anyway. Today she was meant to be seeing ex's mum which i wasn't happy about given what she had said about me last week but I want to give her another chance, as after all she only has ex's word to go on. We were planning on getting the bus into town (even though ex's mum drives apparently she can't drive here), which involves a mile walk to the bus stop on a country road, today when we went to go it was really icy and my cheap pushchair just couldn't cope with the icy, muddy road so went home with the thought of getting a taxi, text ex to let him know that we may be a bit late and that he'd have the car seat. He said no. I told him there was nothing to say no to and then he replied not to bother coming in at all and called me every name under the sun. So after getting ready, attempting to get the bus, ordering a taxi etc we are now not going and i just know his mum is going to blame me. I've just had enough and i'm really tempted to just stop all contact and let him take me to court, but know that's probably unreasonable.
If you've stayed with me then thanks, i'm not really sure what the point is of this i just need to let it out.