Finally get my life back on track, now ex wants to cone backM

[Onamincepiebreak]

After 2 year of putting me and our kids through hell, my Ex wants to come back.
He has been a great friend to me recently, but could I forget what he has done to us in the past?
I think the kids would love having there Daddy home, but there are so money things that he did that pushed me to the brink. I also know he wouldn't be willing to cut certain people out of his life that have actually told me to slit my wrists and worse.

If he isn't willing to do that, does that mean he can't really care for me that much?

My family would be so angry at me if I took him back, but should I put the children first? And I miss having a partner, I'm not sure if that means I miss him or just having 'someone' which I will never have, as I don't have a social life at all.

He wants to have a talk in a weeks time

You need to look at how bad things were at their worst. Could you take that again? Do you WANT that again?

How long have you been apart?

I think maybe you are feeling lonely and remembering how it felt to have someone to share life with (kids aside) but if he pushed you to the brink before, what are the chances of him taking it further than that next time?

Just because he wants to talk in a week doesn't mean you have to agree. He doesn't get to set you deadlines or make demands of your time/emotions. You are no longer a couple.

'I also know he wouldn't be willing to cut certain people out of his life that have actually told me to slit my wrists and worse.'

Then the answer is NO. NO talk. He doesn't get to decide your life anymore.

How about you try dating before even entertaining the idea of taking him back.

You are putting your children first, but leaving someone who made you so miserable and put your financial health in such jeopady.

Absolutely put the children first.... by not allowing this man back in your home to mistreat you all over again. Children want lots of things that we, as caring responsible adults, know isn't good for them. He is one of them.

Get support from your family if you feel yourself weakening. Then work on developing your social life so that you are not so reliant on this man for friendship.

I'm not surprised he wants to come back, either. He sees you with your life back on track.

don't do it for your kids

Cogito has taken the words out of my mouth. Absolutely put the dc first by NOT allowing this man to screw their lives up again.

It's a funny thing about kids... they often have a short attention span and although they may find it a novelty to have their father living at home again, it's probable this will rapidly wear off and they'll wish him gone again.

Work on your self esteem and work on your social life and don't settle for less than you deserve.

As for his 'talk' in a week's time - tell him to fuck off talk to the hand.

Forget the 2 years' of hell he's put you through? That'll only happen when hell freezes over, honey.

It doesn't matter how much he cares for you. How much you care for him does matter, though. You would have to want him, not just "a partner" and you'd have to be sure that it wasn't, ultimately, going to be bad for the kids to have him come back.