This is my first post and I really need some help as I can't talk to anyone about this in RL I have two DD, one aged 3 and the other 7 months.
I will start the story from two weeks ago when I and my partner had a verbal argument which turned into quite a big argument which ended in me telephoning the police. Anyway the police ended up checking his record and finding something on there in regards to sexual abuse.
Rewind 11 years when I first met him. He told me that there had been some trouble when he was younger in regards to sexual abuse but he never did anything and it was someone else but the person said it was him for some reason. At this time in his life he had just lost his mother to a brain tumour with whom he was extremely close with and there was a lot going on as he was staying at different family members houses including the ones that he didn't get on with. Please remember his age at the time all this was going on which was 14 years. Anyway, when he told me this I believed him and didn't think anything else of it.
Fast forward to yesterday. The police came to my home with social services which was a pre-booked appointment with me. Now, I didn't know social services were coming as I was just told it was going to be a police officer and also thought it was to discuss matters in regards to the verbal argument. However, when they came I was quite shocked to find that they were coming to discuss what had been found on my partner's record. They asked me what I knew about it which I told them what he had told me. The social services woman then told me that I need to have another discussion with him about it but she could not tell me anything because of data protection. Once I have a discussion with him then she will need to conduct and assessment on both of us.
So, after they went I telephoned him and asked him to come round (he moved out two weeks ago after the verbal argument for the sake of the children).
I told him what the appointment was about and after a bit of a struggle I got it out of him that it was him who did the abuse at the time. He found it very distressing talking about it and has been riddled with guilt and unable to come to terms with what happended. I beleive he needs to go and see a counsellor to talk about it and why it happened. Anyway he admitted that it was him but he refuses to tell me what actually happened and how old the child was at the time. He says it is sick, he feels sick when he thinks about it and he cannot possibly tell the woman he loves (me) what happened. He is scared that it is going to change how I see him (it probably will). He has blocked it out all these years and has black spots which have caused him many other problems in his life.
Anyway I need some help/ advice... I don't really know. My head is in bits. It doesn?t matter what the initial argument was about what matters is the fact that my babies could be taken away from me. I don't really know what I am looking for on here.. This is just one big nightmare. What do I do??????? I am 26 and he is 29 so this happened 15 years ago.
Thanks for reading.