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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

he's a complete knobhead!

20 replies

slinkstah · 01/04/2006 09:58

im sick of it, he went out for a few drinks last night after work, he rang me at 7 and said his phones battery had almost gone but he was on his way home. i was therefore expecting him around 8. he then rolls in at 11pm and wonders wtf i am pissed off!

his phone was dead so i couldn't contact him, i am having a high risk pg and so he should stay contactable!

last time he went out a few months ago he did the same thing- promised not to do it again! i would not mind if he went out till whatever time, but calling me and telling me he is on the way home and then getting drunk and forgetting about me waiting and worrying is out of order!

when he came home i told him all this and he drunkenly appologised.
this morning he just left with my ds leaving my dd rolling around the house alone and me in bed thinking he was downstairs.
and guess what... his phone is off!
i reckon he has gone to get ds hair cut, but has not even discussed where he was going etc i also wanted a say in how ds hair was cut! too much to ask????

am i being unreasonable/ hormonal?

all this type of stuff on top of other relationship stuff which is really another thread/story, its making me really unhappy.

OP posts:
LadySherlockofLGJ · 01/04/2006 10:01

No you are not being unreasonable, but is there any need for such a horrible word in active convos.

morningpaper · 01/04/2006 10:12

it seems quite restrained in the circumstances

LadySherlockofLGJ · 01/04/2006 10:13

Possibly, but not something I need to see first thing on a Saturday morning.

nicolajc · 01/04/2006 10:16

oh slinkstah my heart goes out to you it really does my dh does exactly the same i got so scared last time i ended up ringing the local hospitals it is so un reasonable of them when my dh does it he says he is on his way back from some where then 12 o'clock at night he strolls in completely drunk apologises non stop the nwxt day and tells me then its my fault i have drove him to it!!!!!!!

I know call it his whoodenie acts as he completely disapears of the face of the face of the earth mobile turned off etc.

its not got to the point and i really hate myself for it but i dont trust him i know hes not cheating and i trust him 100% there but he cant resist the pub and no he is not an alcoholic before anyone thinks that! now i cant let him go anywhere unless i go with him as im convinced 1day i will get a call saying he has been stabbed, run over is even dead so i can really simpathise with you, you are noy over reacting as you and your children should be his priority not the pub! big hugs for you nicola

Original poster
slinkstah · 01/04/2006 11:20

sorry ladysherlock i didn't really consider knobhead as swearingBlush

why are blokes like this? your dh sounds the same as mine nicola! he came home not long ago and i yet again told him off and he yet again appologised and that was that. Till the next time, if he does this type of stuff now what is he going to be like after baby comes along?
i have calmed down now anyway, its really nice to get a second opinion sometimes:)

OP posts:
CarlyP · 01/04/2006 11:45

KNOBHEAD isnt swearing.....if youd have said 'see you next tuesday' then fair enough.

blomey ladies, the poor woman si having a shite time, leave off with the morals

Pinotmum · 01/04/2006 11:49

Sounds like he needs to grow up. You shouldn't have to tell an adult off. He apologises and then carries on and does it again. I think you need to sit him down and make him realise there's 2 grown ups in a successful relationship.

Senoracod · 01/04/2006 11:51

lgj you miserable old woman

hark at you the mopral majority!¬

Senoracod · 01/04/2006 11:56

lgj you are a nob head
nob head nob head

LadySherlockofLGJ · 01/04/2006 12:04

I don't know whether it is just an Irish thing but in Dublin it means the same as Mr Richard Head, if you get my drift.

rickman · 01/04/2006 12:07

I don't find dickhead that offensive either!

LadySherlockofLGJ · 01/04/2006 12:10

Must be just me then, actually I find D**K head less offensive, it is just the image that knob conjures up,eeeeeewwww. LGJ shudders.

Senoracod · 01/04/2006 12:45

puffy pants

ggglimpopo · 01/04/2006 12:49

Knobhead is writhable....

VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/04/2006 13:03

LOL - cod has called you a nob too lol!

If he only goes out every couple of months i dont think its a big deal personally. If he did it every weekend or night then yes - he would be a total nob head.

As for this morning, well maybe he just didnt want to disturb you.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/04/2006 13:03

er one of those lols should have been LGJ Blush

whatatosser · 01/04/2006 13:47

Yep totally not fair
Leaving you wondering where he is/waiting up for you is too inconsiderate, are there no payphones in pubs these days!?

I'm having some husband related troubles and have got the usual great m.net response.

I used 'tosser' and 'jerk' in my thread title/alias.
is that not as harsh as knobhead?

MeerkatsUnite · 01/04/2006 14:42

slinkstah

Do not think you are being unreasonable.

Would suggest you talk with him about this when he's sober and thus more rational - you may get more than a drunken apology then. Tell him how you feel without shouting or anger if at all possible. You can also remind him that the last time he did this he promised you sincerely not to do it again - a promise he has now gone back on.

You need to get to the root of why he decided to stay out as late as he did after telling you at 7pm he was on his way home.

You mention other relationship stuff as well - what's going on there?

maltesers · 02/04/2006 17:11

IMHO Ladysherlock... he is a complete knobhead and a selfish irresponsible git... Tell him so slinkstah. Get him to go to relate if you want it to improve . good luck !

Original poster
slinkstah · 02/04/2006 20:21

thanks for you responses mumsnetters:)

meerkat- the other stuff is a very long story, i will post about it all one day, under a changed name though incase he reads.
at the moment i am trapped, can't do anything to rock the boat because am relying on him for support because of this difficult pg which theres a high chance i wont get to term.

maltesers- is relate free/cheap?

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