Is it ever acceptable to call your wife a hoare & cunt whilst holding your baby

[Moomin1000]

When ever my husband gets mad he calls me these awful names whilst holding our daughter his voice raised I say not in front if her and he just ignores me!!! I've threatened to call the police but he says if I do that he will fight for custody! I don't know what to do :-(

He's scaring you into not doing anything but putting up with it.

What happens when it becomes more than words?

Or when he uses those words against your daughter?

Speak to woman's aid here

Also might be worth getting this moved to relationships as loads of knowledgable people there.

Is it ever acceptable to call your wife a hoare & cunt whilst holding your baby?
Moomin even calling a prostitute a "whore" is seen as insulting so, no, it's not acceptable.

Nothing would make staying with this man worthwhile - it will also affect your daughter/her view of relationships as she grows. His behaviour is completely unnacceptable. And it never usually improves (that sort of behaviour) it generally deteriorates as controlling bullies seek to inflict more pain through emotional abuse. Good luck.... It IS in your hands to do something about it...

He sounds like a nasty piece of work, but at some point you will have to stand your ground & call his bluff.

He is nothing more than a basic, common or garden abuser.

He ticks all the boxes, even to his career choices.

You will never see any better from him, only worse, he'll hit you, and he'll treat your dd the same.

Worse, if she grows up with him, even involved in her life, she'll end up with a similar man, cos she knows no better.

She is.picking up.on the tension, babies.do, even in the.womb.

You are her only chance. If you can't find the strength to tell him to go, then please just let him go.

We're all here for.you, you can trust us. I promise you your life.will be incomparably better, but only without.him in it.

My dh called my son a fucking cunt - he is now my stbxh.It takes a lot of strength and i didnt have a baby to cope with - I do have 3 ds though.

My thread is on here somewhere - you can do this - it wont get better

Please go and see a Solicitor you wont be penniless - I am actually financially better off as i get tax credits which effectively pays for a mortgage to keep a roof over my head.

It is never acceptable even if you are on your own. Don't put up with it.

I agree- get legal advice.

You could have been me five years ago. It got worse he put his hands round my neck when I was holding the baby.
It's taken a very long time for me to get straight but you can do it. Try also Respectphoneline 0808 802 4040, only open Monday to Friday 9-5. They run courses for abusers who want to change. Also google Freedom Programme and look at their good man/bad man diagram.
There is no point trying to reason with someone who has no sense of fairness and goes straight to abusive words and deeds.
Get some help and support outside of the home - baby groups/tell HV and ask what she can do to support you, go to GP, ask relatives but this man is not going to damage you and the baby.
There is loads of support here too.

If not for yourself, do it for your daughter: We must not have another generation of women who have grown up seeing that abusiveness to women is normal, and that is how they can expect to be treated themselves.

What a disgusting man.

This is mental abuse. Protect yourself and your daughter.

Like everyone else has said, this excuse of a man (I hesitate to use the word man) is discusting, treating you like this. You must get away from this spiralling downward, relationship. Please take note of the good advice that other MNers are giving you .

10storey, sorry, no intention to offend, and most police officers ARE above board, but the job does also attract those who abuse power.

I've seen it too many times. The charity thing too, many abusers love to give the impression of propriety, it further weakens any chance of credibility and support the victim may try to secure.

the only way to stop a man like that callig you those names is to remove yourself from his environment. my x was the same. all set to portray me as mentally ill, take the kids off me because i was unfit.... yeah right. five years on and he visits them four times a year and doesn't contribute a penny!!! with a man like that it's all talk. i agree, go to your HV and tell them that he is verbally abusive. is he only verbally abusive? my own x had a right quiver full of arrows. emotionally abusive, financially abusive, and eventually physically abusive as well. get away from him before you child says 'what's a whore mummy?'. i remember my dd's little friend who had anice dad saying to me 'my mummy's name is kimmylove'. I realised my dd would have said my mummy's name is 'you're whore'.
good luck

It's never ok to ever be called that by someone who is meant to love you. You don't want your daughter growing up being taught this is ok for men to do to you