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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Do I rekindle this friendship?

3 replies

Feistybird · 30/03/2006 16:57

ok, so I have a (platonic) male work friend, who I've known for some years and although not close mates, we did work together a few years back and would occasionally have a coffee and a gossip, he is good company and very quick-witted.

He no longer works in the same part of the country so in recent years, we've communicated by phone/email.

I don't know his wife well but on the ocassions I did meet her (before they moved) I thought she was truly lovely, really lovely and they also have 2 gorgeous kids.

Now the crunch.

Some months ago I found out he had been unfaithful to his wife, that he'd admitted (to a mutual friend) that it hadn't been the first time. His wife had found out, they'd tried counselling and he'd done the dirty again. He has now moved out and I gather the relationship is irreconcilable. I understand his wife was/is devastated.

I am soooo disappointed in him - I really never thought he would do such a thing (prob because I never ever saw him in that way) and since the split, we've not been in touch. He has never told me any of this, but I guess he guesses I know.

Now, the thing is, should I get in touch? He was/is a mate and although I could quite easily live without the friendship, potentially sooner or late we will bump into one another in a work capacity.

I would have no embarassment in doing so, but I feel treacherous towards his wife - even though I didn't know her very well - it's kind of a sisterhood thing, does that make sense?

What d'you reckon?

OP posts:
desperateSCOUSEwife · 30/03/2006 17:07

I would leave it as it is for now fb

WharfRat · 30/03/2006 17:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Feistybird · 30/03/2006 17:33

I just can't help thinking 'tosser'.

OP posts:
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