Hi all, we have been together 20 years from when we were young. We have 4 lovely children. Things have been hard, especially lately. we are really skint most of the time and he works very hard, and most of the weekend. my parents are lovely but his are not. they add pressure at every junction. he works with them... never a good thing... and they always ruin his time off with us and add loads of extra pressure. he started acting strange, really forgetful, he would forget to pay bills, we would get charges left right and centre. he'd forget to say he used a card that had no money left and we would get charged again. he was always sorry, and just looked confused and baffled as to why he'd done it again. i don't know why i didn't see warning signs but hard when you're in it too. one say we had an arguement and he drove off to shops. ages later he wasn't back, i tried calling and texting but nothing. so i got all 4 of my little kids in the car to go and look for him. i ended up lost down some dark scary lane. again i tried calling and texting what had happened. he text back saying that he was gone, and that me and kids were better off without him as he was useless. i was terrified. again frantically calling and texting all while lost in a dark lane with 4 kids. in the end he answered and was crying his eyes out saying he had driven to beach and was ending it all. after many calls to police and him, in the end he came back. but he looked a broken man. now i should of taken him to docs then, but he was fragile and i didn't know what to do. A few weeks later he started acting like it was nothing, and that it would never happen again and it was just the state of the house, the lack of money and his long working hours getting him down. anyway this has continued. at the end of august he lost loads of weight. our mortgage was bouncing every month on top of other bills. his parents were being their usual difficult selves. people starting commenting to me about his weight loss and was he ok as quiet. one day we had an arguement and out of the blue he annouced he was leaving. now this was so strange, he has always been a family man, he loves us all and would never walk out. he had also stopped doing things he enjoyed with friends, and stopped inviting anyone round. he said that it wasn't just the money etc and that he needed to leave and felt relieved at the thought. i gently suggested he was depressed, and he agreed that maybe it was true and that he would see a doctor. things started to improve slightly and he took on a second job. this just added to the tiredness. he can't handle emotional deisions anymore, and last week we had to make a decision so he turned a bit funny. then he annouced he was leaving again. he now refuses to go the doctors. i don't know what to do.