Married to dH for 7 years, 2 dcs. We are happy and he is my best friend but he is very unemotional. He never randomly kisses me or tells me he loves me, he is pretty much silent during sex although he does enjoy it(he might say 'that's nice' or somthing. He kisses me on leaving the house, before we go to sleep etc, the routine pecks and says 'love you' after sex (though sometimes after a nudge). He has never told me I'm beautiful to him or really said how much I mean to him (if I do mean lots even). If I say 'do I look nice' he might say 'you look fine' or 'very smart' or even 'sexy' but never unprompted. He does however make lots of sex jokes, not very crude, just 'oo-er' kind of ones. He often particulalry mentions bjs (which I don't really like). Every so often I get down about the lack of affection, and it seems to particularly make me sad after sex, I guess becuase thats the time I'm really longing to hear him say something loving. I've told him numerous times how sad it makes me and has made no effort to be more affectionate.
Anyway last night we were having some foreplay and I said (stupidly) 'say something nice to me' 'love you' he replied in a sing-song voice. I said I loved him to and then (stupidly again) said say something else, (fishing for compliments I know) and he said 'like what?' and I just suddenly felt so sad I couldn't stop crying, I compltetely spoilt the moment (we had been having fun). Discussion followed, me trying to explain that I really need some affectionate words sometimes and him saying ' but I said I loved you' 'of course I think your beatiful' and me saying 'please will you try' and him saying he would or he'd never he the end of it, so I'm still crying now.
His parents are v unemotional - no hugs as a child etc. But i just find it really hard to live without affection. I have changed lots since we married - moved to new area, had children, adapted to life as a sahm, become much better cook / housekeeper, tried hard to overcome shyness re bjs and I'm busy and generally happy apart from this one area. He has barely changed at all, does same job & hobbies but with addition of me and DCs.
Sorry that is so long but any advice would be welcome.