stuck in a rut or just out of love?

[jodie1984]

i'm sorry but this is a bit long and i really need some help.

i am 21 with 9mth old ds. dp and i have been together for 6 yrs since school. he was my 1st and only love.
anyway i moved out of my parents house at 17 because i dint get along with my step mum and the only place i could go was to dp (to his parents) i fell pregnant with ds at 20 after i was told i couldnt have kids due to endometriosis!!

we are now in a council flat since october last year and i am back at work for 15hrs a week. dp has his own business and only works 2days a week so he looks after ds when i am at work. he also has a hobby (fishing) he goes fishing when ever he can all day and all night and hes going to france for a week in april.

well anyway the thing is im not sexually attracted to him anymore well for about 2yrs i seems to have hidden it well or he is just thick!! it is not my sex drive because i know any other man would do it for me, but dp just doesnt.

please help. if i leave him i will have nothing

have you tried to spice up your sex life with toys and/or sexy lingerie

I know how you feel as have been where you are and i am sure alot of other mn,s have been through it too.

Also the strain on having a young family can sometimes lessen your sex drive

my advice would be to get a babysitter, go out for the evening and then experiment sexually that you are both comfortable with
good luck
xxx

IMO if you are sure that it isn't just a phase or hormones it is probably time to leave.

I think that the sujestion of trying to spice things up is a good one. (if you haven't already tried it an he agrees to it)

But tbh two years is an awful long time to feel like this about him and sometimes it's just that you slip into being more like friends than partners.

Have you spoken to him at all about it?
Remember, you will never be in a pos where you have 'nothing', there is always help out there for you and staying with someone for fear of ending up with nothing will not make you happy... but that is my oppinion..

thank you for your help, i dont think spicing things up will help i dont think i could agree to it never mind him.
weve talked about the way he makes me feel inside but not that i dont find him attactive anymore. if i was honest i would say i only care for him now but when i think of leaving i cant imagine my life without him.

whenever we row he tells me to leave! i wouldnt leave ds in a million yrs he has never looked after him for more than 6hrs.

i just wish my mum lived closer

Leaving him will be hard emotionally, no one is denying that, but you have to ask yourself if you can put up with another year of feeling like this, let alone another 6years... If you can then fair enough, stay with him, but if you can't bear the thought, then you might as well make the break now so that you can start the healing process.... again my oppinion...

I mean have you looked at your options for moving and starting fresh, maybe you could get a place nearer to your mum?!?!