"Looking back, do you think that if you'd been physically abused you'd have got out from under quicker, Hissy?"
Izzy I was physically abused. But only occasionally at the beginning of our relationship, and again when I was PG and out of work, extremely vulnerable.
Later, when he really went for it again, I was thousands of miles away, 4 storeys up in a building with no lift and a 2 yo. I'd never have made it down to the ground floor with luggage AND the child, so what to leave behind the first time I go?
Even assuming I had got downstairs with luggage and DS, i'd have to find a cab, 99 times out of 100, I'd have been sexually abused, ripped off or both. I'd have to have fleed to a hotel as airport over 300km away.The sexual harassment would be extremely likely in any hotel, even 4 star, it's the culture dontya know. 
So no, I didn't get out then. I had to stay put, and wait for the time to come when I could come home.
I came home a few months later, 8m after he followed, I thought he deserved a chance in a normal country to be a more normal human being. I was wrong, but at least I know. I tried. 
He never hit me again, because in the 8m I had on my own in the UK, before he came back, I'd found MN and knew the score. I didn't have the strength to leave, but I had the strength to resist and to stand my ground. I didn't want to leave, I didn't want to admit defeat, but I should done, I wasted precious time in my life. I just built on that slowly, asking questions, putting 2 and 2 together.
Half of me accepted the blame for him hitting/kicking me. Physical abuse in my story was better than the WEEKS of verbal tearing to shreds my Ex did. At least a kick was over and done with quicker.
the guy that our OP is dealing with is a WHOLE other kettle of fish, he is extremely violent, he is escalating and he sees he is entitled to do whatever he likes.
My dear love OP, you are in danger, I know you don't want to believe it, you don't want it to be so, but please know that we none of us want to believe it, we none of us want to see these men for the monsters that they are. He WILL kill you.
EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US would wave the magic wand, even now, years on, to wipe all that nasty away, to make him normal. We can't make him normal. He's not normal.
Have you read WHY DOES HE DO THAT? By Lundy Bancroft. I didn't for months, but eventually did, after he had left. It took away all the pain I had, all the guilt and the self criticism that was going on the time, i realised that none of it was my fault, that he CHOSE to be the way he was and that he could choose to be nice, but he didn't want to.
Please forgive yourself, you have done nothing wrong, in fact you gave someone a chance, that's never a wrong way to think. He abused you, your trust, and your family, he will not stop, he will only get worse.
he's already being extremely violent towards you, you don't have much time.
Please call WA, you are precisely the woman they need to hear from, you are not making a mountain out of a mole hill, rather the opposite. We've all done that, but you will have the rest of your life to come to terms and heal.
Please don't be a victim, another statistic. Please don't let him do this to you, please save your children, save yourself.