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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How do they bloody manage it?

12 replies

ladygoingGaga · 30/09/2012 21:20

Turn everything round so it's your fault, then you end up feeling guilty.

I'm living with my ex whilst house sells, no other choice Sad

We used to share the jobs round the house, over last few months though it has gone downhill. All he has done in the last month is cut the grass, maybe twice!

We both work full time, and I have a DS too, so invariably I'm cleaning and tidying and don't sit down til 9pm.

In the last month he has taken on a cash in hand job working every Saturday, all day.

I asked him, quite reasonably for more help today, to do what he used to do... He went right off on one, and had the cheek to say to me I shouldn't be going out every night, I have been out 2 evenings in September when DS was at his dads, in fact Friday I cleaned the bathrooms and toilets before I went out!!

He is out 3/4 nights a week, staying out at least 2, and does nothing round the house

Seriously, how do they do it, how do these lies come out of their mouths so easily??

OP posts:
JustMeAndTwo · 30/09/2012 21:21

Why does he have to live at the house?

So sorry you're having a hard time

ladygoingGaga · 30/09/2012 21:32

He won't leave, my DS is at local school, his family all live 25 miles away have spare rooms but he won't go.

My family are 4 hours away, if a friend had a spare room believe me I would be gone!

It his opinion that because I ended the relationship I should leave. Even though I ended it through his cheating, I think he genuinely believes he has done nothing wrong.

OP posts:
myroomisatip · 30/09/2012 21:35

hhhmmm do you wash his clothes, cook his meals? That needs to stop right now!

ladygoingGaga · 30/09/2012 21:41

I don't cook cook for him, or do anything for him as such. I suppose I do wash his clothes, but I just wash what's in the laundry basket..

OP posts:
charlottehere · 30/09/2012 21:43

Stop washing his clothes!!

MushroomSoup · 30/09/2012 21:45

You wash his clothes??????!!!!!

ladygoingGaga · 30/09/2012 21:48

Point taken Blush

I've done it to keep house tidy, as its on the market, but will stop. It will mean a backlash of some sort, but I will brace myself

OP posts:
clam · 30/09/2012 21:54

So, if someone comes to look at the house and his laundry is around, you stick it in a cupboard and shut the door on it firmly.
I sincerely hope you haven't been ironing it too!!!

JustMeAndTwo · 30/09/2012 22:00

So the property is in both your names yes?

ladygoingGaga · 30/09/2012 22:04

Yes we own it jointly. Not married, and DS is not his, two things to be thankful for.

He is just so clever, everything is always turned round to be my fault, he has not been back since having a go at me for asking for help, and believe me I asked him nicely.
He has just text me saying he was staying out of my way tonight as his head is in a mess.

OP posts:
JustMeAndTwo · 30/09/2012 23:23

how are things progressing on the sale?

JustMeAndTwo · 30/09/2012 23:31

have you been on this thread?

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