I've posted before about my difficulties with my very controlling, very self-focused, very aggressive mother. In the nine years since my dad died, my mum found a new DP. He's a lovely fellow, but I was always a bit worried that mum would drive him away by being super unreasonable and selfish about his wanting to see his family. And now she has.
They were just going to go on holiday together, but instead they've broken up and mum is devastated and has almost no-one to talk to or lean on. I have to say that is largely her own doing - she's driven away or let slide all her old friends and our relationship is strained at best.
In fact I've been having therapy to deal with her effect on me - a short short visit leaves me desperately unhappy and a quivering wreck for days because she seeks out my soft spots like a piranha. I can't, for my sake and my DD's (and DH's), be in contact with her too much. But it upsets me a lot to hear how broken-hearted she is. It's like a flashback to when dad died. Does anyone have any advice about how I can help and support her a bit without letting her too close?