Sofas and Slankets V Irregular choice shoes and Snogging - Dating Thread 23

[watchoutforthatsnail]

:)

Thanks Watch. I give up on OD for periods of time because it can get very disheartening! If you are right, I have about 10 - 20 dates to go. Lol! And stalking him should be quite easy! This is a small Suffolk village (and a small estate in a small Suffolk village!), somebody is bound to know of him/about him.

Hatesponge he sounds absolutely bonkers! (scaredofpeas)

Parsley, who know's why they weren't interested. I think that's the problem with OD, that you will never know why someone rejected you. I'm size 8 and haven't had a single message from any man so I'm not convinced size is the key to success in OD. I think it's just like real life, you can't explain why you're attracted to one person and not another. I've been in a situation where, choosing between 2 men, I was much more attracted to the person who actually wasn't very good looking compared to the other.

I have made a consious decision to not go on the sites if I'm already having a shitty day. My own paranoia is that no one will be interested because I've got dcs already. All the men I'm interested in so far have no kids, and would like kids in the future, I'm pretty sure that's putting them off me.

Hi Can I join your thread?
I need some advice..
Husband left 4 weeks ago, having an affair, but we had become more like friends who had sex occasionally if I'm honest. I am not too bad re. getting over it all. 2 DS, 11 and 10.
I guess i want someone to tell me i am nuts t be thinking about other men, but when might be a good time? How long did others wait?
I'm37

oh good, we like a bit of stalking. Sponge is very very good at stalking!
:)
and hurrah for no fish and no bikes or cars. and i think we all like a bit of nice grammer and correct spelling!

I did have a stupid number of first dates, in the beginning i thought it would be easy and id be in a relationship within a month or so. lol.i was SO wrong. Just down to numbers and luck and how high your standards are....

ooh eiepie it could be really romantic?! Like something from a chicklit novel. Do you like the look of him?

I think I'd be inclined to do a little snooping around to get a RL view

Labisiffree I was the same as you, our relationship had been finished a long time before we actually split up (house took 9 months to sell and we had to share until it was sold) and I rushed into a brief relationship with a lovely chap. For me, it was very much about finding out whether I could a) attract someone else b) could still 'do the deed' after 14 years of being with the same partner. A confidence booster, if you like. Personally, I wasn't properly ready for about a year but my friend met someone before she had actually moved out of the home with her ex - and she's still with him a year later. Be nice to yourself and know that there's a lot of emotional turmoil to breaking up - even if you've been estranged for a while. Take care.

lab - i waited about 9 months to start dating, in hind site i was no where near ready. It was more about confidence boosts and seeing if i still had it.

Then i got very hung up on someone and had something of a somewhat emotional relationship, but never physical. And i still dated but did the awful thing where no one compared to him.....

Quite possibly, and again with hindsite, it wasnt until early this year, 3.5 years later, that i was actually ready, emotionally, for another relationship.

Im sure i read it takes between 18 months and 4 years to recover from a divorce. I would be kind to yourself....

Thanks Red! He's tall, has hair (!), has a job (his own business, don't know what yet), can spell, doesn't have a motorbike and looks nice in his photo. So, he's passed the first few criteria! Let the snooping commence! :)

ahem - i have circulated a pic of the pirate to a few of you on fb... but ive forgotten who some of you are, so, if you havent got it, and want a nose, do let me know

;)

Verrry nice Watch! xx

EiePie I'm the same with you about the grammar.

Had a message "Your a cute 1" Bless. Delete

Could also be that he was holding a fish in his profile picture

Thanks watch I am an excellent stalker

The not knowing WHY you've been rejected is for me the worst part of OD. Not so much the why you've been rejected on basis of profile/after a few emails, it's the relentless post-date rejection that gets me. It has taken me a long time to come to terms with the idea that I won't (in the majority) of cases ever find out why, so now I just have to believe that it's not me :)

It is annoying though - the guy who stood me up earlier this yr (and then gave a crappy excuse) is now 'in a relationship' (you can find anything out via FB/some light stalking!) with a girl who is - and apologies for what I'm about to say, I know it sounds awful - a lot less attractive than me, with no job and 2 very young children. I did momentarily think what has she got that I haven't, but I'm never going to know the answer to that, and just have to tell myself it's his loss (which it is very much more so than mine...).

Mac "Bless. delete" Lotfl!! You and me both! Everyone's allowed the odd typo but the two sites I'm on both have spell check - and they STILL can't get it right!

oh sponge, haha. i understand that.
A guy i dated last summer, who messed me about lots, who in the end said he was too in love with someone else... has just had a BABY!with some othergirl, who wasnt the one he was in love with.
This is the ' cum tribute guy' who was still trying to get me to sleep with him at about easter time.

baffling.

you are the BEST stalker. Top stalkering credentials :)

cheers pie - i think hes quite lovely.

That is....'roll on the floor laughing' and totally deliberate and soooo not a typo!

Sponge it is most definitely his loss.

Any stalking tips?

EiePie that's true! But it's more of a first impression thing. If you can't be arsed to even try and string a sentence together properly, what will you be like to date?

No, no no!! I meant 'LIE on the'....... oh, never mind.

Stalking is easy if you know someone's full name, and particularly if they have a name which is slightly uncommon.

FB is the obvious one, but couple that with Twitter, loads of people are on there under their full name, and unless they are set to private which v few people are (unlike FB where hardly anyone has a completely open profile), you can read all their tweets, see who they follow/follws them etc. 192.com is good for checking who they live with (though can be out of date) have caught out ones who arent single like that before. Worth cross checking that with FB - for example if on 192 Mr X lives with Miss Y, look for Miss Y on his friends list, and check out her profile (for some reason men on FB often have private profiles whereas women dont) for the 'in a relationship with...' bit :) then there's always LinkedIn and good old Google.

Twitter is my latest revelation. Did I mention previously finding the Barbour on there? If ONLY I'd had access to his twitter around the time of our date I'd have realised what a total f*ckmuppet he is, sending loads of creepy tweets to practically every single woman on there . Ewww.

Must, must MUST go and get on with some RL but before I do, I have a question for you all. As yet, I haven't introduced any new man to my children. I had lots of 'uncles' as a child and I'm determined not to subject my three to all that confusion until I'm sure the relationship's got 'legs'. DD heard (from someone in the village determined to make mischief) that I had a date last summer and it was a bit of a shock to her. So:

Q1). How long did you leave it before introducing 'new' man to DC?
Q2.) How did you go about it?

Q3.) Did it go well?

If ever I get past a 6 week fling, it would be good to know about your experiences.

Ta everso. x

Morning :)

Have to confess that I haven't read all the posts since I last posted, just skimmed reading the odd one.

Snape did look at your links wrt the notebook...stunning work as always.

Welcome to those who are new.

EiePie it's wine o'clock in Australia

Oops, that should read afternoon, just looked at the computer clock

Q1. would depend on ages of children.
Q2. I haven't yet, have had a few dates in the past but the most dates I've had with one person was 3.
Q3. N/A

Q1 I've been going out with Mr Nice for nearly 6 months and DC know about him and that he's my boyfriend but haven't met him yet. Think it's going to happen soon though.
Q2 he's going to come round here one day after work and obviously my DC will be lovely and he won't be scared off.
Q3 ask me that in a little while

He won't be staying the night while they're here for a while I don't think from both of our points of view. I have met his DS which was fine and occasionally bump into him at Mr N's house. My DC seem to be fine with seeing XHs girlfriend and her DC every so often although as she lives about 200 miles away if she's here when they're with him she is there all the time so to speak. There was a time recently when she was there a lot which I think was a bit much for DS and so XH made sure they had some more time on their own (ie him and the DC)

I feel the time is right for DC and MrN to meet but will still have daft nerves when it does

My children are 6, nearly 9 and 11.

Miranda 6 months!? I can only aspire to six months! Well done Missus! x