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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What would you do?

2 replies

flowerbag · 14/09/2012 12:28

My ds was bullied by his older cousin for about a year. It seems to have stopped now for the past 6 months but we are constantly monitoring the situation. My ds never seemed to be aware that he was bullied he was 4.5 when it started but my dh and I believe he was. Examples of what his cousin did were asking him to play football and hitting him repeatedly with the ball, telling him his best friend was dead, hitting him on the head repeatedly with apples, excluding him from games.
We have tried to keep them apart as much as possible but with family gatherings and visits to grandparents it is not always easy without looking like the baddie.
Now my MIL wants to bring my ds to his cousins house for a visit, she knows what happened and has told me she will keep an eye on things but I feel that she misses things and my nephew knows he can manipulate her he is 11, my ds is now 6.

Should I give the cousin and my MIL a chance but I am so afraid of my DS being hurt.Most of the bullying occured when my ds was in my MIL's house but she did tell me about it.

I do not want to be overprotective and maybe he should be given a second chance

OP posts:
JollyJumper · 14/09/2012 12:47

Can you try and talk to the nephew and his parents to start with? After all it is his parents responsibility too to ensure no bullying takes place? And bullying is a pretty horrendous trait of character and usually they tend to be bullies for life.
I'd go with my DS if I were you. I don't care for being labelled overprotective, I can't stand bullies and I'd keep an eagle eye on that 11 year old. He's twice the age and should know better but if he's been allowed to get away with it why should he stop harrassing your poor DS.

flowerbag · 14/09/2012 12:55

Thank you Jolly, he has not been allowed to get away with it, his father spoke to him about it and my dh and I also spoke to him about it. He does seem to have changed but I amm still concerned. My ds is very upset that he can't go as unfortunately I have to bring my dd to a party this evening and cannot go with my MIL. I feel that I am the baddie

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