Some of you might remember my history a bit, split with xp in March, 2 years after he had an affair with a work colleague.
Started seeing a very nice man - had lots of fun with him on a fwb basis but it gradually settled into being more like a real relationship. I've now ended things with new man, partly because I've realised that I started seeing him too soon after splitting with xp, I've realised my whole life I've been someone's daughter, wife, mum, girlfriend - never just me, and partly because xp had started contacting me, (saying all the right things about how he's changed, realised what he'd done wrong etc etc etc blah blah blah) xp and I met up last weekend, got on well, but I just felt.. nothing. It was all a bit meh. He kept saying how much he misses me, wants us back togethr, is a changed man. No sex or anything like that. Just spent time together, few drinks in a pub, then he missed his train so came back to the house and we watched tv - stuff like that.
He was honest with me, said he'd been dating thru pof and that he had contacted ex-ow just for closure - at the time I had no problem with that, but now I notice that he's friends on fb with her and that he also made a post about how he'd left someone very precious behind and was going back to reclaim it... one of his friends commented asking if it was in 'town where I live' and he replied no, somewhere else, which I take to mean he was referring to ow. I'm guessing he tried his luck with her and she turned him down.
I feel physically sick at that, even tho I don't want him back.. all the hurt and betrayal has come back into focus. I'm second best - he only wants me because she doesn't want him.
Not sure what I want from you guys but I feel like shit right now :(