aargh, done it again

[needtochangenow]

dh about to have major duty dental treatment
i did not hear my mobile, was in park and dc upset and crying in my ear
he rang 3 times in space of 5 mins, but I only heard it on 4th time and he was angry when we spoke
because he could not reach me
he is angry, i feel mixed
part of me thinks it is not that bad, I did get to speak to him...so defiant and also thinks outting his stress and fears onto me...
other part of me feels bad because not there when he needed me...
common pattern....what to do?

What's the common pattern?
Him getting pissy because you are not instantly available, or you never being there when he needs you?
2 different things imo

what are you supposed to do, stare at your phone all day on the off chance it rings and GOD FORBID you miss it and have to return the call.

YOU WERE BUSY!!!

he sounds unreasonable. He expects you to be on high alert all day for a call you didn't know was coming. would you expect that from him //?

my x was like this too though. I bet you have MILLIONS of other examples of his lack of reason?? sorry to presume, but I recognise this guy so to speak, is this the TIP of the iceburg.

If he's extremely anxious - yes he's reflecting onto you.
If it were me I'd give an apology and get something small that would help him feel better and thought of.

At least that's what I'd like if I had the dentist and dh was at the park

dru - his getting pissy. I am there for him, but was not instantly. history of me not hearing the phone and he gets pissy....but it has never been anything urgent. i was there when it was.

Olympia -
you are right. he does not hear the phone sometimes...and then it is not allowed to be a big deal. that is why i am so mixed on it. double standards.

oh fgs tell him to man up and stop controlling you