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Original poster

Can this be innocent?

29 replies

TheBigBlueWhale · 30/08/2012 08:31

Usual good morning text from H not received today.
Instead i've got one clearly not meant for me - saying "fuck not married"

No idea what it means or if it can be innocent.? I just cant see how it can be...

He has some form on internet sex chat stuff that I thought we'd got over.

My reaction is that he has sent this to me instead of the woman he is trying to fuck. We are married have a child and I'm heavily pregnant.

Not sure what to do. I've not replied at all. Suspect he knows he's sent it and is in silent panic.

please help

OP posts:
Trioofprinces · 30/08/2012 08:33

I wouldn't say anything but try and go through his phone tonight? If he doesn't realise he's sent it then a history might be here. If he realises then presumably he'd have deleted everything.

ErikNorseman · 30/08/2012 08:33

Ummmmmm
I don't see how it can be innocent
Omg sorry

Trioofprinces · 30/08/2012 08:34

How recent is the Internet sex chat issue?

Trioofprinces · 30/08/2012 08:35

Yes, to be fair doesn't sound innocent but you want to know what is ping on hence suggesting his phone (not something i'dnusually suggest without provocation).

Hugs...

newmum001 · 30/08/2012 08:38

Id txt him back and ask who it was for and what it meant. Chances are he knows he's sent it so would have deleted the history anyway. Its going to take some explaining so the less time he's got to come up with an explanation the better. On second thought ring him and see what his immediate reaction is when you tell him he sent it to you.

notnowImreading · 30/08/2012 08:38

Could he be playing 'fuck, marry or throw off a cliff' with one of his mates? Perhaps he would rather fuck Anne Widdicombe than marry her?

Chelsea91 · 30/08/2012 08:44

Is any of his friends not married? maybe he was saying as a joke to not get married

LB1982 · 30/08/2012 08:47

Hmm. Tis rather odd. Presumably it's a fresh message and not in reply to anything which I find bizarre otherwise he would have hit reply not compose. Why would anyone send that as a fresh message? The text doesn't even make sense. What sort of question could that be in response to?

LB1982 · 30/08/2012 08:50

Does he have an iPhone and if so, could it be one of its interesting auto corrects?? Is he the sort of hubby who would send you a brief message like that?

countingto10 · 30/08/2012 08:50

Just phone him, say you want to see his phone on his return with the entire chat on it, if anything is deleted then you will know that it is not innocent. You want the unabridged truth now, anything less and he will be out on his ear, with the truth your marriage may stand a chance.

If it is innocent chats between mates then there should be no problem showing you.

Sorry this has happened.

countingto10 · 30/08/2012 08:53

I have sent someone a reply meant for someone else on an iPhone - think it was to do with the way the messages and chats were arranged and trying to carrying on a couple of chats at the same time.

Pozzled · 30/08/2012 08:58

'nappies' can autocorrect to 'married'. Is he looking after a baby?

overmydeadbody · 30/08/2012 09:02

Call him and ask him?

dranksinatra · 30/08/2012 09:02

Hmm.
Surely it should read, "fuck, not married"
If he is chatting someone up, she got got shirt grammar, innit?

dranksinatra · 30/08/2012 09:03

So I think it may be innocent.

SpiritInMotionDaddyman · 30/08/2012 09:12

Maybe he's forgotten his wedding ring? Dw and I use that phrase when one of us isn't wearing our wedding rings.

bubalou · 30/08/2012 09:22

First - i hope for you this is innocent, if not he is a prick!!!

My advice is - don't act angry or strange towards him - be normal.

I would reply something like 'think you text this to me instead of one of your mates. I hope 'fuck not married' wasn't wishful thinking' Smile x'

Then just let him give you whatever excuse he wants and say 'ok hun I was only joking, see you later for dinner' etc.

I know this sounds silly (especially when u want to rip his head off) but if you alert him and there is something going on he's just going to be even more careful covering his tracks. Trust me i have been in this situation with a previous bf and it worked. The safer they think they are the more likely you are to catch them. Then you are able to check phones, laptops etc over the coming days.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

chocolateistheenemy · 30/08/2012 09:29

I must admit that I can't really think what "fuck not married" would be a response to, and as a comment it doesn't make a lot of sense either! You'll eat yourself up over this if u don't ask so if I were you I'd phone and get him to explain.

Original poster
TheBigBlueWhale · 30/08/2012 09:58

Thx everyone. My instinct is that someone has texted him asking if he is married and he is replying that he isn't.

Previous history is about 2.5yrs ago.

It's been hour 2 hrs since text but I've got good reason to have not replied yet.

I almost don't want to hear his denial and id rather just tell him to fuck off.

Just not going thru this again. Pregnant or not.

OP posts:
Keepthechangeyoufilthyanimal · 30/08/2012 09:59

I don't understand what the text could mean either - would make more sense if it said 'Fuck Married' eg. If he was up to something terrible and the other person had said 'We cant..you are married' and his response was 'Fuck Married'
Fuck not married doesn't make sense?

I really hope it is something innocent that was meant for his mate or something OP. I hope you get an explanation.

Lovingfreedom · 30/08/2012 10:00

Don't text him back, will only give him a chance to concoct an elaborate defence/excuse. When you get a chance, show him the text and say 'oh yeah, what's this all about?' and put him on the spot.

TurnipCake · 30/08/2012 10:05

OP - has anything else happened recently to set your radar off?

Original poster
TheBigBlueWhale · 30/08/2012 11:48

Ok. So it's innocent. Turns out it was the no wedding ring explanation.

Very very relieved tbh! Phew.

Thanks for your kind posts. Smile

OP posts:
stuffitunderthebed · 30/08/2012 11:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlackberryIce · 30/08/2012 12:07

Who was he explaining wedding rings to?