sensitive question

[victimofsa]

I've namechanged for this as I've only just started admitting it to myself, I'm not ready to admit it to anyone else :(

As a young child I was sexually abused. I'm now seeing a counselor for this and am getting the help I need.

I'm realizing my thoughts and feelings are that of a scared vulnerable child, not a fully grown mature adult. I do not want to pass on my fears, angsiety and issues on to my dds (6 months 22 months)

So with that in mind, I want to ask, when will DD1 be too old to be in the bathroom while dh or I shower?

I'm not asking if she's too old, she's still a baby, but this is something that has been bothering me recently.

So what's normal?

When she says she is not comfortable with it. Always take your cue from the child. For years they can be quite un self-conscious and quite happy with their own and other's bodies. Then one day, and for no apparent reason, they don't want you around when they're in the bath and they certainly don't want to see you in the nip!

Every family is different

My daughter decided at quite a young age she was too big to be seen naked or to share a bath etc and wanted privacy.

But my boys are always prancing around in The nude and see me and my H with no clothes on too . They're 11 and 9

She'll probably lead the way, don't over think it

Hello. Well done for posting this, it's obviously taken a lot of courage

I was also sexually abused as a child. Lots of people on MN have similar pasts if you ever need to chat about it :)

My DD (5) still wanders in when I'm having a shower and doesn't seem to be bothered by it so I'm not either. If she gets embarrassed then I will start locking the door! DH always covers up in front of her though and has for most of her life, he also had an abusive childhood and worries a lot about doing anything inappropriate. DS (3 today!) goes in the bathroom with him as well as me because he's taught him how to use the toilet etc.

I think those things are personal choice really, and it only becomes 'wrong' if the child is embarrassed and the parent still makes the child see (that was the issue with DH's mother). And I don't think children usually become embarrassed until they are older. :)

My DD is 10 and is completely happy with nakedness.

I think as others have said the main thing is 'Is everyone happy?' If someone is feeling uncomfortable (you?) then you have a right to privacy.

Usually the child decides for themselves. My 10 yrs old is happy for DH and I to see him nude but stopped letting his brother seeing him about a year ago.