My husband has left to stay with a friend. I asked him to leave. I feel I had no option. A bit of background. He has been unemployed for over a year and it has been a struggle for him. He is a kind, funny and generous man. He is always thinking of others and always does what he can to support our family. His friends think the world of him. We have aways had some problems with conflict resolution. He says that I am incapable of taking my share of responsibility for issues when they blow up. I disagree with that. We both disagree over what the other person said/has done etc etc and then it ends up in a row.
In the past we have had stupid rows which have started over the most trivial things but have generally tried to sort it out after prolonged periods of silence (yes.... very mature!!) This week we have had a terrible row because he was drunk and I was worried about him spending money we just dont have have. He turned into a really horrible, unpleasant, aggressive arse. He was saying some awful things to me. I kept saying I did not wish to talk about it as he was drunk but that just made him worse. He was being vile, yelling and shouting and swearing. At one point I became frightened because I have NEVER seen him like this in the five years we have been together. He then chucked a cup of water over me and stormed off. When I think of the row I get an awful knot in my stomach. We have not spoken and I asked him to leave today because I feel so devastated at how he turned on me. I just didnt know what else to do. I cant even look at him. I am terrified this may spell the beginning of the end of our marriage. I geuninely feel I did not do anything to warrant this. I was calm and reasonable with him in the run up to him turing on me.
I dont know how long he will be gone for. I just have no idea what to do next 