Unhappy

[Jamandcheese]

I'm so unhappy. I'm living in a marriage where my husband cheated on me. It's coming up to a year since it happened. And I feel overwhelming sadness.

I have two beautiful children and I should be grateful for them, but I can't. I wish I was brave enough to do something to myself. I just wish I was nO longer around. Then I wouldn't feel the pain.

I don't want happily ever after, just happy for small periods. Am I that bad a person that I deserve all the shit?

No you are not a bad person.
You sound depresessed with thoughts of not being here.

Please speak to your GP and get some help.

Oh love, I'm sorry you feel so low. Please can you talk to someone about getting some counselling support?
Are you and your husband working through what he did or do you need to go to some counselling together? Please try and find some support to help you

I'm sorry - I hope someone with more advice comes along soon x

Jam, exactly what LosingIt said.

You are not a bad person, shit happens to good people all the time. I feel your pain, I have been there. I did not feel like I didn't want to be around though, I considered self-harm as I thought the physical pain would be easier to deal with than the pain I felt inside.

Please see your G0P for support, mine was fantastic.

How are things at home? It's never to late to leave if that's what you want, but I would suggest GP and counselling before you get there.

Take care.

((hugs for you)) if you have children then you will always have someone who loves you and needs you.

You do sound depressed and you should go to the doctor. Counselling is what you need to talk your feelings out.

You don't sound happy in your marriage and if you can't get over the cheating then maybe it is time to accept that and move on,...

Ring the Samaritans if you need to, they will be a great help to you as well

Take care

Thanks for your advice. I'm already on anti depressants.

I'm having a shit week. And I just feel like I'm losing my grip on everything

When did you last see your GP?

About three months ago. In due to see him next month

I was put on Citalopram and I upped my dose from 20mg to 30mg recently as I was going downhill again.

Im like the others.I think you need to see him this week.Could you get an appointment for tomorrow do you think?

And tell him it is the anniversary coming up.Anniversaries can be hard.
Tell him things.

No partner is worth dying over. He's only a man, not a supreme being: think of all the other good things in your life, your DC, your skills and talents, all the things you enjoy doing.

Am I right to be annoyed? Today is the day h cheated on me.

He had a work thing to go to and said he would come home after that. He has now emailed and said that his work colleague, who I know very well, has said that they could go out and he could stay over.

I know he has asked me if it's ok and said that if I say no he will come home. But shouldn't he know that today is o hard for me. That I should come first for him. I'm not here to tell him his responsibilities, am I?

I would be annoyed too! Does he remember the significance of the date? I'd remind him and leave it at that, or say that I would like him to come home outright. Hang in there, Jam, he is not your evything.

Everything*

I'm booking a hotel and spending a night there. Sod it, he can look after two babies under two on sunday morning. I'm going on Saturday and booking it now. And goin to book a nice hotel....stupid man

He shouldn't have asked you that. You shouldn't even be aware that his coleague suggested a night out, he should have just been home at the earliest possible opportunity. Of course he should be aware of the date.

Is he making an effort in other ways, or is he expecting that you will be over it by now?

I unfortunately know how you feel and it is normal.

He needs to know how you feel... In plain clear language.
Booking into the hotel should definitely make clear that there is an issue
The 1st anniversary is the hardest... It gets easier

you need to leave your husband. see your doctor and concentrate on you and the children. I dont't think your a bad person i just think you need people around you who care and love you.