Won't go and won't pay...

[mowmi]

I am about to file divorce papers. My husband has been vile over a long period of time, highlights include spitting at me!
He thinks we can sort it out, we can't because I will not live like this anymore and I will not let my beautiful boy think this is a normal relationship and family dynamic - we both deserve so much better.
My question is around money. As soon as he gets the papers he will stop paying his half of mortgage, childcare and bills, I know he will because he threatens it all the time. I know I can't get him out of his house (long term plan is to buy him out, well kind of as we're in negative equity but I can take the mortgage on my own) but what can I do when he stops paying in the short term?
Will I have a case with the CSA? Even though we are both in the same house?
I get so angry when I think of him sitting in this house without paying a penny for it or his son but I know this day is coming....
I could just walk away and let it get repossessed but I want a stable home for my son.

Any words of wisdom appreciated x

Have you discussed the possibility of applying for an occupation order which will require him to leave the marital home with your solicitor?

Not yet, she knows my situation but hasn't suggested that yet. She was more concerned with me checking the lender would let me have the mortgage on my own.

If he's abusive, not only can you get him forced out of the house by a court order, but he can also be forced to pay maintenance; the CSA will deduct it from his earnings if he refuses.

Id get in touch with mortgage provider to make them aware of the situation too.

Thanks ladies, thisi is the last bit of control he has on me and I know he'll deploy it sooner rather than later.
What kind of man thinks that contributing to the roof above his own head and that of his son is optional!!
I am so doing the right thing.

x

my ex spat on me. it's just a vile thing to do.

stay strong and post in legal.

it sounds like you need a rottweiler solicitor, and she doesnt sound too hot.

Thanks Sassy - it's so awful isn't it? To be honest I'm disappointed in myself for not divorcing him straight after the incident.

I think your first priority is to get him out. Once he's out, everything else will fall into place.

As Sassy has suggested, post on the Legal matters board for general advice and for recommendations for shit hot solicitors, or locate your nearest Women's Aid branch here www.womensaid.org.uk and give them a call during office hours as they usually keep a list of lawyers who are experienced in persuading abusers to take a hike vacate marital homes.

www.womensaid.org.uk

i cant say anything- i let him get away with it 3 times!