How can I help my friend in the right direction?

[JackJacksmummy]

A long long story about my friend whose husband is mentally and physically abusing her, making her believe she's the ones with problems, kicking her taking her money, having affairs etc.

She won't leave him because he threatens to take two of her kids - he won't take the oldest one (13) because he is a handful - he has severe SEN.

This man has stopped her seeing all her friends and family, including me up until a week ago when we got in contact again in secret after 3 years. He plays happy families in front of everybody but we all know and witness what a cock he is to her.

She is scared of being alone, having no money but the effect it's having on her and her kids is, in my eyes, enough to just get up and go but I've never been in the situation and obviously it's harder said than done!

Please tell me what I can say to her to help her regain her strength and confidence.

Point her in the direction of www.womensaid.org.uk and tell her that if she dials 999 the next time he kicks off or attempts to physically abuse her, the police will remove him from her home and he'll have more than his work cut out if he attempts to 'take 2 of her dc'.

Alternatively, she can call in at any police station and ask to speak to an officer who specialises in domestic violence.

It could be that she's best advised to seek refuge at a women's shelter where she'll be helped to put in place all that's needed to keep him away from her and the dc, find alternative accomodation, and given all the support she may need when claiming benefits and other entitlements.

You can assure your friend that in this day and age no woman with dc is left homeless, nor is she left penniless, by leaving a an abusive twunt of a man.

I suggest you also tell her that the sooner she gets this twunt out of her life, the better it will be for her dc.