Practical help, please

[onesixonetwo]

I'm a regular but NC to protect my RL identity.
It's been a shocker of a weekend.

I have to dash to work so will explain more later but trying to be practical please can you help me to answer these questions.

If me & DD go to a refuge can they force me to change DD's school?
She's in the middle of her GCSEs and I just can't do it.
He wouldnt try to go to her school or approach her.

How is housing benefit calculated?
I just want to work out whether I would be entitled to it and if so how much.

Does anyone know anything about the scheme whereby local authorities lend people in need the deposit for a privately rented property?
How does this work, please?
We are already on the housing register.

Finally, I don't mean to feel sorry for myself but I feel so alone.

And eat something. I am famous (in a v minor way!) for recommending Weetabix - and in fact have just eaten 2 W with milk.

"You may think I am being weak in helping DH but he is in a really bad way"

You're not weak but you are being manipulated. I've been far too closely involved with alcoholics in the past and this is totally consistent with my experience. When they sense everyone has finally had enough and is about to leave them to stew they up the ante, go on a bender and generally inject some high drama. So keep your wits about you because he has kept you on the hook for all these years and he's not going to lose his primary carer without a fight.

As for your DD, I think you need to be honest with her about what's going on. Most teens think their parents are a joke, so all that rubbish about having an affair and flouncing out should not distract you. She probably wouldn't think Dad was so wonderful if she was in his sole care.

Good luck

DH's recent drinking has been a result of a recent family tragedy of the kind that would shake anyone, no matter how sound their mental health to start with.
When I awoke this morning DH next to me was struggling to breathe, so much so he was a funny colour,he doesn't have asthma or hay fever.
I took him to the Dr who was excellent and prescribed DH diazepam. DH knows he can't drink and take diazepam at the same time, he has to go back to the Dr on Friday.
This isn't a fabricated drama, I wasn't exaggerating when I said he needs some mental health intervention.

Myself, I am ok. I am well rested and I have eaten.
I have an appointment with the local housing team early next week.
Having thought about it I would prefer to hold out for a housing association house rather than renting privately. Which I realise may take a while.
I have given Mum some money to start saving for me.

I may be being manipulated but as I will have to wait for housing it is important to make my life at home as comfortable as possible for DD and I for as long as it takes.

Glad to hear that GP is involved, and that you have rested and eaten, and are taking suitable steps. Sending strength, if you need it.

Read your thread and didn't want to leave without posting although I have nothing useful to add to the already great advice you've been given.

Thinking of you and hoping that things go well, you sound incredibly resourceful and level headed, hope that you find plenty of support in RL.

When you are at the supermarket ask for cashback to add to your savings.

Thank you again for all of your good advice.
I looked around the house, I have a large pile of stuff to ebay some of it has been hanging around for ages. I hope a move will feature in the not too distant future and I don't want to take the stuff with me so I put some of it on ebay today with more to do tomorrow. There are some books, branded clothes - both mine and DDs, all in all I think I should make £200, which will be very useful.

Sorry if I'm just posting about irrelevant stuff but it helps me to order my thoughts if I keep typing it down.