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Original poster

if a man holds your hand, what does it mean?

19 replies

atrickyquestion · 05/08/2012 23:04

I was walking home with a friend last night, and he reached out and held my hand. I was a bit surprised, but in a good way. we walked home holding hands and chatting and it felt lovely but then he just said goodbye in the normal way (hug and a kiss on the cheek). I've no idea what to make of it all...
maybe he just felt I needed steadying (we had had a few drinks and it was a little busy at the beginning)? maybe its just a friendship gesture for him? my head is spinning a little

OP posts:
BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks · 05/08/2012 23:10

I would'nt think too much about it.

I would do that with a close friend, possibly a stranger after a few drinks Grin

Just wait and see if you get any other signs

SoleSource · 05/08/2012 23:25

Just feeling comfortable and relaxed with you. Enjoying walking with, feeling protective, steadying you. Maybe attracted too. See what happens, keep us posted.

Numberlock · 05/08/2012 23:26

Would you like it to mean more? Sounds like it with the head spinning? Perhaps he was seeing how you'd react.

BertieBotts · 05/08/2012 23:27

I'd definitely think of that as a sign that he likes you! Surely if he thought you needed steadying he'd put an arm around your shoulder?

People don't normally hold hands with platonic friends, not in my experience.

Original poster
atrickyquestion · 05/08/2012 23:32

numberlock I don't know, its complicated (distance, and very different lives). I know I care about him deeply and that feeling has grown stronger over time. I don't know if that's all I want it to mean from him too or whether maybe we both feel something more than just platonic. I know I liked holding his hand. But maybe that's all it is, just a really close friendship. Sometimes I think I would be relieved if thats all it is (like I said, its complicated)but there is definitely a part of me that will feel sad if thats all it is.

OP posts:
Original poster
atrickyquestion · 05/08/2012 23:34

Bertiebotts yes that's what I would have thought, arms round shoulder/ arms linked. Handholding felt quiet intimate to me. But may be its normal to him, I don't know.

OP posts:
Numberlock · 05/08/2012 23:35

How complicated? When will you next see him?

SoleSource · 05/08/2012 23:36

How often do you see him?

Original poster
atrickyquestion · 05/08/2012 23:40

I don't know for sure, probably some time this month, we are both incredibly busy which is part of the whole 'complicated' thing I guess.

OP posts:
Numberlock · 05/08/2012 23:49

How old are you both? Are you concerned about losing the friendship if the dating didn't work out? What distance are we talking?

Belle50 · 08/08/2012 23:49

I think he really likes you.

NagooingForGold · 08/08/2012 23:55

He likes you. And it's respectful. That's nice.

yikeshowdoidothis · 09/08/2012 08:40

He has a soft spot for you & finds it easier to show feelings in a physical way rather than openly discussing them.

CogitoErgOlympics · 09/08/2012 10:00

If it had meant more than friendship it would have been followed up by more than a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Rather than keeping guessing, why don't you ask him how he feels?

panicnotanymore · 09/08/2012 13:16

I've never held hands with a bloke who was just a friend. Well not over the age of 8 anyway. I have had a bloke friend who wanted to become (and did become) a boyfriend take hold of my hand on a night out though....

Personally I'd go by how much you'd had to drink. Enough to lower inhibitions - he likes you. Enough to be plastered - I'd never mention it to be honest.

MissFaversam · 09/08/2012 13:56

If a platonic male friend went to hold my hand I'd think he was up to something as in showing me he fancied me.

Lueji · 09/08/2012 14:37

I don't know, Cogito.
He may well have not gone further because he didn't get a response.

Not even a smile?

Or he may like to go slowly.

cupcake78 · 10/08/2012 06:24

I hold hands with a couple of my male friends, usually after we'd had a drink and when they were getting me to a taxi or home etc after a night out. I have grown up with these people which is slightly different I think.

It's just a nice affectionate thing to do with someone you like being around.

Original poster
atrickyquestion · 14/08/2012 22:50

sorry, slow reply! leuji well guessed, although I accepted his hand when he took mine, I am not sure I looked at him again for the whole walk back or indeed even when we hugged good bye Blush. I think I was too shocked by it, albeit in a pleased way. we are both very shy I guess. we had had enough to 'lower inhibitions' but definitely not plastered. I haven't seen him yet to ask, and not sure if I will have the guts to do so when I do (in case it was just a friendship thing Blush ) but I have decided that it must at least mean he cares for me a lot and that makes me happy

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