Trying to find thread about woman leaving abusive marriage to ? A Tunisian ?

[Windsock]

Was it. And she was moving out when he was arrested

Did she get away in the end ?

Yes, she did..

BRILLIANT. If you're there op well done. You are super brave. Hope it's all so much better.

'twas me. I got out. Not in pleasant way at all. Was escorted out at 3am with both babies by police after H's friends came round at 2am banging on doors etc. Came back next day, packed left. Every day is a new drama. In no particular order:

He got bail
I live far away
Got prohibited steps, non molestation orders
Babies settling at new nursery
We have new place, it's nice
Looking for work
Went freelance for old work but need proper work locally
H and friends start emailing
H arrested for breach of bail and court order. Remanded in custody.
Nursery invoice me £1400 for the notice period I didn't give.
H denies majority of abuse, have to give evidence now. Scared.
Got H's family court statement is a pack of lies that really upset me. Weirdly, the part where he said he did the majority of the childcare shocked me the most.
Family court gave him supervised access to sort out details in the next month (though obv is stays in prison this is a non issue for now)
He went to pieces and begged for forgiveness as did his family.
He is now suggesting I have harmed the children by taking them away.
I still miss him and am very angry I do.

This has happened in space of three weeks. Catalyst was H trapping DC and I in house for 5 hours, throwing furniture, ripping door door off hinges.

I owe a massive debt of thanks to all in MN who have bee so wonderfully supportive. I had thought once I left that would be the hard part. I fear it has only just begun.

I am still careful with what I wear and where I go, on some level I am still following his many rules. Am seeking counselling. It will take time.

Local police are great and regularly patrol house and surrounding area.

Thanks to everyone. I am very up and down. The DC are ok. dS2 is thriving. DS1 is unsettled, but to be expected.

so good to hear you got away & are all safe away from him. I'm new to MN but read your OP at the time. I think the support MN offers is incredible. And I think you are an incredible woman & mother.

I wish you all the best for the future. I'm sure the court will see.through all his lies.

Wishing you all the luck in the world.

Only just saw this. Are you lawyered up ? Do ask for help. Lots of lawyers on here
Hope police are good. You must NOT go back. You know that. :). Are the kids happy? Did I miss that?

Oh kids mixed.
Lots of love to you. X

I remember your story too.

I think you are inspiring, brave, courageous, intrepid, amazing and incredible. Life is literally throwing you some shit, but you are just getting on with it.

It WILL get you to a better place, you will eventually look back and feel like you have made it to the other side.

Lots of love and luck with whatever comes along next.

Hi HowAmI - glad to hear you're safe and well (as can be expected)
You are amazing and so brave. I hope the future, for you and Dc, is a calm and kind one xxxx

I don't know your backstory but your experience of being married to a North African mirrors much of that which one of my friends has undergone.

The immediate question that come to my mind is what right does he have to be in the UK? Is this a right conferred on him by marriage to you? Has he been granted citizenship?

While he's remanded in custody you have the opportunity to breathe easily but it seems that his friends/family may take it into their hands to continue to apply pressure to you.

You say that your local police patrol regularly. How safe is your new home? Do you have a dedicated alarm/panic button linked to your local police force?

Of course you are 'up and down' but don't let it get to you even when some days you're more down than up. All things must pass and, given time, you'll come to miss him like you'd miss a hole in the head.

As for what you wear, dress to please yourself. If this means you wear clothing that you know he'd disapprove of, feel the fear and do it anyway because you do not live in Tunisia and you are not bound by his cultural or religious norms or expectations.

So so pleased to hear you got away, I had been thinking of you x

Just sending hugs and good luck wishes.

You do have to develop a thick skin, because he will come up with all sorts of lies and strategies and threats. :(

But, based on his behaviour, I doubt any court will believe him.

You should tell nursery to invoice him.
Can you ask for such costs as part of a victim compensation? Ask CAB or a solicitor? WA might be able to advise too.

OP thanks for starting this post. I was following the post that was removed and Howami, I have been thinking of you alot and hoping that all was well with you.

It sounds like you're doing brilliantly well for both you and your children. Be strong.

The support and advice offered by other MN'ers on that thread was amazing. I can't offer anything but moral support but I'm sure anyone who followed your story are full of admiration that you had the strength of character to go through what you went through. That man seems to only think of himself. To send his crazy friends at that time of the morning banging down your doors shows that he doesn't care about you or his kids. You must have all been terrified. The fact that you managed to leave under those circumstances is incredible.

Good luck with everything and I'm sorry you're having to go through more crap but at least you can deal with it from a safe distance.

Take care and don't let the bstrds get you down. You sound like an amazing mum and woman.
xxxxx