Since period returned I can't stop fantasising about other men....

[Spryte]

DH and I have 3 DC and I stopped bfing our youngest a few months ago. Since then I am constantly having dreams about other men (actual sleeping dreams, not daydreams!) that I'm having sex with them or am in love with them. When I wake up I can't stop thinking about other men, although no one in particular.

My DH is good looking and sexy but I just don't feel that attracted to him, what the hell is going on?!

I think you and DH need to talk, reconnect and find an outlet for the excess sexual energy that's keeping you busy at night.

I feel like a teenager on heat and I'm 31, it's ridiculous!

Why don't you find your husband attractive?

I think he's good looking and has a great body but there isn't much spark, the romance & excitement has gone and I pull him up on it from time to time (I make much more of an effort than him) and he will make a joke about it then it's forgotten.

I am not planning on having an affair but I find the thought of 'this is it' for the rest of my life is slightly depressing .......

Your dreams may therefore be about releasing pent up frustration rather than sex per se. It is very depressing to be in a dull relationship where you're being taken for granted & your feelings are dismissed as funny.... and I don't think you should settle for 'this is it' quite honestly.

Thank you Cogito, what kind words of wisdom! We do have a pretty full on life with 3 young children, no family support and no spare cash for a babysitter. DH does try his best, he's a good guy but we are both just swamped with nappies, bickering and swimming lessons.

I identify with this. My dh and I have two dcs and I feel I am always initiating sex and trying to be intimate and romantic and he just wants a quickie and not interested in making me feel special. It's very depressing. I love him and find him physically v attractive but we also bicker about housework and are chronically tired.
I too have had dreams about making love. Some of these involve dh and others characters from films.li fee, unspeakably said I think it will always be like this. He used to be besotted with me and spend so much time making me feel good. Now I feel like I have to pester or beg to get a decent kiss.
Our youngest is only eight weeks old but surely I should th exhausted one?
I guess you either talk about it, try initiating stuff yourself, accept it for now or leave.
I am accepting for now and trying to initiate. Talking no good as he just gets defensive and leaving not an option I want to take.
Just being hopeful it will get better in time but I could not feel this taken for granted for ever.