How do you keep the spice & romance in your love life? with 2 small children

[Littleraysofsunshine]

We have 2 under 2. Would love more too eventually. but how do you find time (even for the small things like having a hug, conversation) and also doing what couples are meant to do!, without having to rush to answer the needs of your kiddies!

I know this is the sacrifice when you have children, especially close in age.

How do you keep the spice & romance in your love life? find the time? balance? even if its the small things.

"without having to rush to answer the needs of your kiddies!"

I think the first step is to realise that your children's needs don't often require any 'rushing'. Unless they are in some kind of mortal danger, finish the hug or the conversation and then see to them.

Rushing was perhaps the wrong descriptive word to use... maybe without being interrupted. Very hard to be intimate if your LO wants attention :)

No it isn't. You might not be able to have full sex when a baby is squawking but you can still be intimate. Intimacy, romance and 'spark' are not sex necessarily. They are all those caring, tender, personal moments that keep you going, knowing you love each other and find each other attractive. It's different things to different people but a hug as you're doing the washing up, holding hands as you walk along the street, sharing a joke, expressing appreciation, doing special things for each other. If you have all of that, the sex is a nice bonus when you get a few minutes to yourself.

And a final tip. Bedtime. When my DS was small, very little in his day was fixed except bedtime. Naps, meals and everything else was variable but him being tucked up asleep by 7.30pm - 8.00pm latest was sacrosanct. Post 8pm was 'grown-up time' and we made full use of it, believe me. :)