The lengths a not so df will go to escaping maint!

[seaofyou]

Just found ex on employment website this morning! Ex gone self employed. Given up high profiled job of 70000euro yr so he doesn't have to support his ds!
Ex did this in 2008 when courts were after him then too!

So it looks like ex will get away without paying...needed that money for Speech and Language and other therapies I hope Karma gets the pig back big time in another life! I feel so sad ESP that I can't give ds everything he needs on my own to help his development.

I give up feel defeated

Ah, I was going to post about pursuing him through tax returns etc, but if the guy is abroad it can be difficult to attach to earnings anyway.

BUT, seeing as it's YOU....

You know this guy is a wanker, you know he's threatened to kill you, attacked your home, threatened your DS, has stalked you, you know you live in constant fear of him.

Why on earth would you pursue him for anything? You need to understand that this man is dangerous both to you physically and mentally.

You have to get away from him physically, and psychologically. He's never going to come good, no matter what you hope. You need to kill him off in your head. close the book on him.

STOP looking at his pissy little blog,
STOP looking out for him.

He's terrorising you without lifting a finger now, cos YOU are doing HIS job for him.

PLEASE go to WA and get some RL support with this. Until you do, you will still be his victim, day in and day out.

When are you going to give yourself your own life back? It's YOUR life now.

Get angry, get indignant, but GET FREE.

If you did what you could - even as a long term plan - to get away from that area, to move on, get a job and do all you can to raise money, even on a charity front, you could get help for your boy. Don't give up.

Don't let this tosser hobble your life any more than he has done already.

Remember, being on your own is a million times better than being with that man. You have hope and a chance at life, but not if you stay cowering in fear of your EX.

Break free. The world is yours, it's waiting for you. Trust me.

Thank you HerHissy for your support!

Feel crushed

Needed the back pay to get me out of of the house sell up buy somewhere else and smaller as mortgage payments can't cope on top of escaping and hoping he doesn't find us!

I was only waiting for court case which should have happened months ago! They are useless and ex had time to give up work to ensure he is not paying a penny!

I wasted 6k on solicitors, Private detective, new front door and the cost of telephone calls over yrs to courts abroad pushes that total higher and not a penny for ds! The emotional cost has been far higher:(

I am going back to work and uni next month HH, counselling at WA helped me to move on that way but I will be worse off due to the amount of hrs I can only work and fees for uni.

YOU WILL GET THERE!

You can rent the house out I think? and as long as the rent covers the mortgage, go rent somewhere else.

You have to face one thing, that your Ex is a wanker, was always a wanker and will always be a wanker. I understand you got your hopes up, but he is what he is.

You will grow from this, you will learn, you will strengthen. He's not defeated you, he has merely put a speed bump in your life.

Keep the counselling up, keep at everyone you can be to get help for DS speech therapy etc. The path you are on atm is clearly not the easiest, but you are on it for a reason. That will become evident to you one day. have faith, don't give up and keep going.

All this WILL be worth it one day.

HH thank you been crying all morning...came back from our first holiday a week today and it has just gone down hill so fast!

Thank you for that idea! As soon as I am back in work I can rent house out and rent somewhere smaller and cheaper to cover fees of renting my house out...not that it feels like a house but a prison! I'll have to take CCTV down too!

The counselling has finished now it really helped and could do with a yrs worth tbh!

All I know is this path I am on must be Karma for bad I did in past life as it is going on and on uphill! I am tired want to get off the road.

I can't believe ex has done it again!

Ño, this is not karma for bad, this will make you stronger. Its sent to teach you something.

As long as you somehow keep the negative that is your ex in your life, the longer it will be until the positive can come in.

Hi I've been in a similar situation and it is the absolute shite end of the stick.

And it's worse because it's your dc's suffering.

I spent years trying to accommodate twatexandtwatexfamily. My only advice would be to fuck them all off, concentrate on you and your DS and you will have a better future.

If I was pm haha I'd charge blokes like this severe financial penalties/make sure they went without.

You can't do that though, you have to walk away no matter how many people tell you to fight

HerHissy you are right! Ds had appointment today with his Consultant at the hospital and he is so blown away with ds improvements...that i know was down 100% down to my fighting like a Godbworking till I cried in pain and collapse every night into bed to get up and start 10 hrs of therapy the next day, day in day out!

My ds was classed as learning disability level not ever expected to do a sum or read etc at this age! But he has smashed the norms and smashed everyone's predictions of where ds would be as a young boy! I never once gave up HH, so to hear today from Paed that ds would have never expected a report from a mainstream school, ne'er mind at this level has totally smashed this morning realisation that ds father us the biggest twat on this earth that that seeps toxins! I am not surprised the man is not riddled with flesh eating STDs because he is so sick and toxic

NWNTGB thank you for sharing your experiences you are right it is just me and ds a perfect loving little family! I am sorry you have been through this type of nightmare too. You are wiser and much happier and I am going to concentrate on future, new start, new opportunities this yr and start to new life!

Chin up old girl and look to the future with my gorgeous sensitive and happy little man:)

So glad to hear that Sea, your DS and you are brilliant.

Call the twuntexf all the names under the sun, you two have shown how bloody amazing you are.

sorry overwhelmed with the olympics

Don't get overstressed, people will help and support, concentrate on you two, mahoosive hug

Delighted!.... you see????

Thanks NWNTGB for your kindness and hugs and love the torch...there's fab the opening was!
HH ...you are always always right! I see now you mention it! I need to draw that line as today feedback from Paed showed me that! Just hope ex doesn't start his fun and games again!