dp walked out, please talk to me

[fransmom]

my dp walked out today after we had another discussion. we have a dd of 10mths but he either won't / can't see that it's as bad for her as it is. i'm just hurting inside because we seem to be stuck in a vicous circle. it seems to be okay for a few days, then it's back to this. i just feel like crying all the time. oh, did i mention that i have pnd2?

oh i'm sorry.
i've not spoken to you before so i don't know if there are other threads about the history between you & dp.
i also suffered from pnd, it is so hard. and puts an awful amount of pressure on your relationship aswell as having a baby to cope with.
do you have any family or friends close by??

hi. i've only recently started posting but my family are over 100mile away, not exactly round the corner kind of thing. have a few friends but find more support/understanding on here sometimes. he was married before he met me, then while he was sposed to be with me,(they were separated and in middle of divorcing) he cheated with her then i had evrybody saying it's ok, she's his wife. excuse me? so basically he's bought a lot of "emotional bills" from her and expects me to pay them. i don't expect him to pay mine, i try and deal with them before i meet anybody cos it's not fair. he been selfish but the only way i can get through to him how he's treating me is to treat him the same then he complains!

sorry about the long post hw back home but we've hardly talked and it's a horrible silent atmosphere with dd in the middle i feel so bad about it for her

Oh fransmom, how awful for you! I am here if you still want to chat. Have been through something very similar myself.

Please don't feel you're alone, you will get a lot of support on here.

Thinking of you x

thanks janos x not sure what to do at moment as atmosphere rather strained. he did come back after half an hour but very little has been said by either of us, so am not sure what to do
dd was playing with his phone about an hour ago, he'd took a photo of his moms grave - not sure if i was sposed to see it or not. if i was, i think its sposed to prove where he was
thing is tho, not sure if said before but we seem to be stuck in a bloody repeating pattern at mo. the whole situation is messing me up at mo v v

fransmom,

hi im fairly new and don't know your history but im here and have broad shoulders if you would like to off load thinking of u xx

Sorry, was away for a bit having a much needed bath after a long day with DS!

It is a horrible situation for you both to be in fransmom. I hope you and your DD are OK. By the time DS's father and I had seperated, things were very much like this between us - not really communicating - and I know that it's hard.

How is your PND, btw? Have you been suffering since DD was born or has it just cropped up fairly recently? Have things deteriorated since your DD was born or have the always been difficult?

Will be arounf intermittently during the day if you are able/want to chat.

Take care x

thank u X we had abit of a chat this morning and he now sees things a bit better, i know that it's not going to be easy but i think it might help if we went to counselling again, we never really went before because we thought things were sorted. i've been before, when i lived back in mids, after mom died and it did help but its just getting a man in there

as for the pnd, i've been prone to depression for quite a long time, even before i moved out of home so i did kind of expect soething cos i suffered badly with ante-natal depression but docs etc never spotted it - i only recognised it cos i saw an article in m+baby mag. i have more good days than bad but when i get a bad1 its bloody horrible. not 2bad today am going 2c bro 2moro, but it cost me 40quid in train fare - ouch.

sometimes we do argue about silly things cos i tell dp about how to do them cos he not been round babies before (he was married before to a t* - sorry mners, a not very nice woman!) so when i act on instict about certain things to do with dd, i tell him. so when he does things differently, especially when i'm feeling irritable already, it doesn't help matters

it will be the 1st time i left fran for more than a few hours but then i need a break and she'll be ok with her dad and she'll be all the better for having a rested mom won't she? (glum, not sad face)

Oh, of course she will! It'll do you good to have a break and she'll be fine with her Dad :)

Hope you have a great time with your Bro.

thank you x i better leave the thread now, the computer is miles away from nearest source of heat and my feet are freezing! ttfn
as you might have noticed my spelliung rubbish when i'm cold!!

well i did go and when i phoned up on my mobile, she never wanted to talk to me!!!! tho i was a bit got dp to put phone on speaker phone, and she kept looking at phone so that's something!

i hated leaving her, even tho i knew she would be ok. maybe she bit young to understand properly? was going to say something else but can't remember now....

thanx mcmum, things not too bad at mobut feel free to cat me if any1 needs chat

i keep feeling nauseous (posh word for me at this time of night) p not yet, not sure what to do. i think i should wait til end of wek and see what happens. any advice ladies?

not pg. did test this morning, had p 10 mins later - waste of fiver