What does it mean when you feel dread and fatigue at the very thought>

[KarmaK]

of hanging out with a particular person? I feel this way EVERY time I am due to see this person. I'm sure it must be a sign to feel so negative and exhausted at the thought of it. And yet the person is perfectly nice. There is just something about her that makes me not want to be around her. Usually when I'm meeting a friend I really like I feel excited and really look forward to it.

It's not good. No real advice, but I feel your pain. I have an old friend who I love (in theory) but who just gets on my nerves. There is a hard to pin-point passive-agressiveness which just makes my heart sink. And the worst is that she asks so often to meet up that I just feel I can't say no to everything. I guess the only thing to do is minimise contact and then self-medicate with wine!

It sounds like you find her very hard work! Being "nice" isn't that much of a positive, tbh, about someone you count as a friend. People can be "nice" while being hard work, negative, an emotional drain, etc etc etc. You don't have to keep seeing people if you don't actually enjoy their company.

What is this person to you? Is she someone that you cannot avoid meeting?
Is there some history that would explain your negativity at the thought of seeing her?

How do you feel when you are in her company? Do you feel exhausted in her presence? Are you longing to get away from her, or does inertia set in?

And how do you feel after you've seen her? Does she immediately go out of your mind or do thoughts of her/the content of your meeting tend to linger, as it were?

It means they are probably a human Dementor.... quietly floating around sucking all the joy out of life.

Oh God, you're not one of my ex-colleagues are you?

It means something is very wrong with the person and/or the relationship, even if you cannot quite pin down what it is.

Sometimes there are things going on in the background you are not consciously aware of; but on some level, ie pit of the stomach level, you are.

I like Cogito's Dementor concept. Get away from them if you can!

Beware also of the very nice, very sweet person who really just speaks in a very nice, sweet voice!?.. and if you look at their words and actions they are actually complete s!

There's a Dementor woman I know through a shared hobby. Lovely most of the time but, if she gets you on your own, starts telling you all kinds of grim personal stuff. It's horribly boring & slightly weird but there she is pouring her heart out... what can you do? I end up saying 'oh dear' a lot and hoping someone interrupts or there's a fire-alarm