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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to deal with narcissistic XP who owes me money?

3 replies

StarRose · 21/07/2012 21:13

I've recently found my way out of relationship with a seriously messed up man. Still struggling at times to come to terms with things as he really messed with my head. However, I am VERY glad to be out of it and ready to enjoy the rest of my life without him. One thing that is still ongoing though, is the fact that he still has a lot of my belongings at his house and owes me quite a lot of money. I spent a whole lot more on doing up his house, which I can't get back and he says was a gift, so I really don't want to allow him to keep the money I have lent him. He's ignoring my calls and emails. I have thought about contacting his family, but I know doing that will anger him and make things more difficult. I am pretty sure he's acting this way just because he now has some power over me. He knows he has something I want back, and he's going to do it when he wants and make me wait for it. I'm also worried, as it's the last thing he has over me, he's not going to repay me/return my stuff. Any advice on how to go about this the best way would be great.

OP posts:
RoxyRobin · 21/07/2012 21:20

It might be a good idea to post this on the legal board. I've seen some very useful advice given on there, often by solicitors.

StarRose · 21/07/2012 21:32

I hadn't thought of that, thank you Roxy.

OP posts:
struwelpeter · 21/07/2012 23:13

I think you can ask the police to accompany you to his house while you ask for your things to be returned and collect them, but it is up to him whether he listens to a request from a copper. Worth calling 101 to find out. Given his narcissism, sadly he will think that everything you gave/lent/did for him is his by right. So it may be easier to simply forget about it.

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