I really don't like my in-laws....dreading the next few months...

[itdoesnthurttohavemanners]

Just a post really to see if anyone out there is in the same boat?

I have absolutely nothing in common with the in-laws whatsoever - apart from the obvious! I disagree with their whole outlook on life, they let their son down imo (and in my DH's opinion) when he was growing up, we don't have similar views on anything (e.g. I'm pro-education, privately educated, 2 degrees, believe in working hard; they don't see the point of education and have 4 children who have not succeeded/reached their potential, 3 of whom are life long 'on the dolers'..my DH is the exception) and I just have nothing to talk to them about at all. They have no interest or knowledge in news or current affairs, so it's hard to make small talk, they are not interested in my job in the slightest (MIL doesn't work, never has done, FIL, he works in a warehouse - I do ask him how work is going etc) and make no attempt to find out.

After 2 years they literally do not know me at all. I find meeting up with them a huge effort. I haven't even met my SIL (I know!)who's just about to give birth any minute now. They don't start conversations, it's all left to me, they ask no questions, they literally no nothing about me, my background, my upbringing, my hopes/fears/dreams/likes/dislikes.

Anyways, I'm 6 months pg and obviously we're v v excited. I'm absolutely dreading how the in-laws will fit in with us having the baby. I'm presuming they will want to be involved, but have shown little/no interest. However, DH naturally talks about how often we will go and see them, how they could look after the baby for us (I am totally totally against this idea!) and how this could bring him closer to his parents. TBH it's as if he's trying to forget the shitty upbringing he had and give his folks another chance.

I realise you can choose your friends and not your family! But do I have to involve our new baby in their lives? They're not interested at present.

I know some of you will probably flame me for this and say I have a duty to make sure our baby has two sets of grandparents, but really, I don't want their influence upon our child!! DH is still scarred by their poor parenting!!!

Anyone else out there got any similar issues with their in-laws?

Thank you new. There has been a lot of sidetracking and what we need to do is listen to the pain. Not get all shirty. There is a LOT of bullshit in this country of the 'working class are saints and upper class are evil' variety, and we ALL need to turn away from it. Because it IS BS and it sidetracks from the real issues.

Abit - what do you mean by NFI?

Not F g Interested.

Ah thanks

Mmm, not quite sure what to think!
Apart from them being on the dole, and fil working in a warehouse you haven't mentioned much else, i have a strong feeling you look down your nose at them because they are not middle class?
Maybe they feel you look down at them, what is wrong with working in a warehouse?
Being on the dole lifelong isn't the best lifestyle, but maybe there are reasons as to why some of them do not work, it doesn't make them bad people.
Maybe you should get to know them as people, not what they do for a living.
Atleast you don't have horrid, toxic inlaws like mine who continually insult, manipulate, put their other gks before my dcs

OP, you do appear to be a tad snobbish imo. I understand that you have little in common with your dh's family, but to be honest when i read your post i actually began to feel a bit sorry for your in laws( they probably don't deserve my sympathy)' .They are probably picking up on your feelings of superiority and therefore want to avoid you at all cost. Who wants to be around someone who makes them feel useless?