DS off on School trip - DH expects a week of sex!!!

[eteokles]

Hi all
My 13 year old DS has gone off on a school trip, and my DH is expecting to spend every moment until he gets back setting the sheets on fire. He's even taken a couple of days off work later in the week to really make the most of it! ( DS has owl like hearing so sex life is non existent when he's about)

Problem is - yep, you guessed it, I've done the washing, shopping, cleaning etc, and will cook the supper as usual tonight, , and I simply don't feel in the slightest bit raunchy.

I know I have to make the effort - I'll take up residence in the shower this afternoon and emerge duly Brazilian-ed, exfoliated etc etc, but am rather begrudgingly going through the ordeal!

Now we've been together 18 years, and I'm beyond stars and fireworks, but I do rather feel like I'm going to be a performing seal - yet I don't want to disappoint the poor man either!

I desperately need some quick 'how to get turned on NOW' tips - 6 hours and counting. Any ideas????

Nothing more offputting than scheduled sex.... . However, now's your chance to tell him - and you have to imagine I've got my sex chat-line voice on now - that when you do the shopping it makes me feel soooo hot for you.... oh yeah, clean that cupboard baby, you know you want to... watching you iron is such a turn-on etc. Might as well make the most of his enthusiasm

Tell him that due to your DS being away, and him expecting sex : your looking forward for a chance to relax, while he cooks and cleans in the evening, does the washing and organises the shopping! Of course that will be the least he can do if a week of sex is what he is asking....

Yes house hold chores for sexual favours!!

Humph. When DD went to school camp for a week DH and I took the opportunity to go out to dinner every night.

Nothing like a bottle of wine, some good food and no washing up to get one in the mood

large swig of red wine about an hour before the deed followed by more large swigs at ten minute intervals thereafter

Like the thought of the household chores/ DIY for sex - might as well get the bedroom ceiling painted if I'm going to have to look at it for the rest of the week!

Wine is currently chilling. - Hope I don't give in to temptation to start it a bit early and be fast asleep by the time he gets home. Then again.......

Nothing like scrubbing toilets to kill the libido.

DH knows full well that I am far more likely to be in the mood if I feel goddess like - that involves being pampered and relaxed, and not thinking about what chores need to be done.

So he can do them and consider it stage 1 of foreplay.

Pmsl at u looking at the celing all wk

Another idea... Chase him around Day #1 and (fortified with your wine) subject him to hours of red-hot gymnastic hooker-sex. He'll probably do himself an injury and not be quite so keen the rest of the week.

I'd probably do myself an injury in the process!! Mind you, I suppose I could finally use that belly dancing kit he bought me a few years ago - have to find some superglue to stick the fake diamond in my navel first, of course!!

You have to sort out the noise issue, buy a lock, put a DVD on so you can pretend to be watching a movie, and have some fun. You can't not have sex because of a 13 year old fears for future

Why are you denying your dc the essential rite of passage that is boaking cringing at the sound of the dps at it?

Bear in mind it won't be long before you're wearing earplugs when he's got his gfs round. Get ahead even now

Oh god. As much as I love sex I hate the fact that DH feels we must have several mammoth sessions if ever the DC are staying with grandparents or we go away for the weekend. I just want to relax not have more bloody demands. And it always has to be long winded, swinging from the chandeliers sex too. I would prefer a quickie so I can get back to sitting with my feet up watching a film.

Doesn't mens testosterone level start to drop at 40? Can't bloody wait.

Which publication is this for then?

a week of no holes barred sex? and you're complaining?

Sounds like it might be Good Housekeeping or Painters&Decorators Weekly, RIZZO

Was that a Freudian slip, doggie?

Aww your dh still loves and wants you - enjoy this week together...go to the cinema, have a meal or two out, snuggle up watching a DVD - you may well feel like swinging from the rafters anyway!!! Don't you miss sex?

Both dcs are away for a week from this Friday. DH's eyes lit up the day we signed the consent forms. I took advantage and have insisted on a 5* spa mini-break.
Housework and ceiling painting? Pah! Amateurs, you lot!