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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So, I have a thing for my next door neighbour

72 replies

ElizabethX · 05/07/2012 14:44

Never posted before, but my sister is an avid reader. Need some advice from some wise women.

Background first, I?m 35 and single. Lost my job 4 years ago, got a big severance package and my mum died 18 months ago (she had Alzheimers and had a fall). I was pretty well her FT carer between losing my real job and her fall. Since that happened I have been the executor of the estate. So I?ve been out of the job market (but busy) for a long time, but between my payoff and inheritance I have never been short of ££ and it looks like I never will be.

I have a nice flat, an income, all my time?s my own. Nice place to be I know, but the thing is I feel I have no life. My friends are all married with kids as is my sister and I have to fit round them. I love my niece and nephew and get on well with my sister, no issues there, but I feel like my life is just drifting. One day I will wake up and be 55, I see no change in prospect.

So the complication, maybe the consequence tho, is I am hopelessly smitten with my next door neighbour. He lives in the next house along and we both have a roof terrace so he said hello one day across the gap between the houses. We pass each other now and then coming in and out. So last week one thing led to another and he asked me in to look at his new kitchen and then said stay for supper. So I did and honestly, I had just the best time, just him and me. He has lovely taste, he cooks, he listens, he is always cheerful, he has introduced me to the other people who live in his building. He walked me home even though it was next door. You know how sometimes if someone stands too close to you you want to step away, and other times it feels so comfortable you don't notice ? well it?s like that.

Oh and he is ok with children. I know this because I was with my sister and niece and nephew one day and we ran into him. He said hello to us all and included them and told us about a puppet theatre going on at the canalside that day that they might enjoy, so we went and they did. So a hit with my sister, who thought he seemed nice. She thinks he is not gay though no sign of a woman. Or of any string of women for that matter.

So wise women of MN, what do I do? I would like to date him and go out with him and hang out with him. I have no idea what he thinks of me but I would be OK with asking him out. All that has happened is I have been in his flat a few times. No snogs, no touching but the body language is there...unless he is like this with all women??? Confused and I haven't been so obvious as to ask about his love life current or otherwise.

But He Lives Next Door!!!!

Madness? What if he knocks me back or it goes nowhere? But is it really any different from dating someone at university where 300 blokes are your neighbours? Am I fixating on someone I shouldn't because my life is so empty?

What do I do?

OP posts:
BelieveInPink · 11/07/2012 20:06

Brilliant, was wondering how it went.

Long may it continue. :)

ImperialBlether · 11/07/2012 20:11

Well I think we all guessed it had gone well!

Grin @ AF - ffs she's not a performing monkey! He's taught her some new tricks by the sound of it and if we keep her sweet she might come back and tell us!

AnyFucker · 11/07/2012 20:18

I didn't say she was a performing monkey, that was the whole point Smile

Mama1980 · 11/07/2012 20:18
Grin
SoleSource · 11/07/2012 20:20

SHE IS ALIVE! PHEW

I agree with AF. Plan a sexy underwear shopping trip. Let him entertain you, seeing/hearing your enjoyment is what men want.

izzy LOL

anniewoo · 11/07/2012 21:58

Oh am so glad you're alive. Was afraid we'd read bout you in the Daily Mail- lurid headlines etc!!!Grin so it wasn't a wind up Blush

WingDefence · 11/07/2012 22:14

I've just seen this thread tonight - so glad it has turned out okay Grin

MushroomSoup · 11/07/2012 22:55

Hurray!!

izzyizin · 12/07/2012 02:10

Performing monkey? Hmm The OP's obviously relishes his nuts and, by her own admission, has been performing a tad more than the Volga Boatmen song with him.

I reckon AF's got a point.

Take it slowly, Elizabeth. There aren't too many happy endings on this board. Grin]

ElizabethX · 12/07/2012 11:44

Well I eventually released him to go to work at about 8 this morning. I went back to sleep in (his) bed full of rude thoughts and I've only just got in.

Took me a while to find all my clothes Blush

I am v glad I did this, it is doing my ego no end of good to be hungered after by a hottie. Will cool it a bit over the next few days or try to...my period is due so will abstain from sex with him and see if he stays in touch...!

Am definitely going to sort out kitchen. Fitter started the job then decided the price was going up. grrr.

OP posts:
likeatonneofbricks · 12/07/2012 12:29

full-on fireworks then!Grin maybe all thtis pent up longing/waiting was a good thing! I have managed a pm now.

quietlysuggests · 12/07/2012 12:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Youcanringmybell · 12/07/2012 12:36

Anyone else want to know what the interesting things were that he did.

foofooyeah · 12/07/2012 14:01

Hooray! Thanks for the update. And fab sex too !! What more could a girl want eh ?

sadwidow28 · 12/07/2012 16:30

What a great thread! Take it a bit steady though .....

mirry2 · 12/07/2012 17:07

OP I want to know ALL about him.

ElizabethX · 12/07/2012 17:08

@ youcanringmybell

Ahem. My family reads this site. Maybe this thread even. My sis knows all the above, I told her where I was going, but still. Ahem.

We are talking, erm, a....flattering variation on a theme. Inventively so.

Others must have thought of it before.

This is all I am saying in the thread...

OP posts:
Youcanringmybell · 12/07/2012 17:45

ElizabethX you tease.....

Grin My imagination is running wild!!
AnyFucker · 12/07/2012 18:04

eh ?

SwedishEdith · 12/07/2012 18:18

I think, with so much spare time, you could turn this story into a chick-lit novel.

I too don't understand "interesting things"

Sallyingforth · 12/07/2012 20:40

Well done OP, you now officially have ... NWB !

MrsMuddyPuddles · 12/07/2012 22:18

NWB, brilliant new TLA :o

YY to the chick lit, or what about taking on a volunteering role somewhere, OP?

Without knowing what you've done, we can't exactly suggest new things to try... :o subtley trying to con OP into spilling

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