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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Please can someone come talk to my about my narcisstic mother, she has had me in tears again.

15 replies

Fimbo · 03/07/2012 17:23

My mother has always been narcisstic. My father her enabler. My dad died from cancer in April (it was quick,6 weeks from diagnosis to death), she only had to nurse him for 2 weeks at home with help from her gp and district nurses and specialist out of hours team. Then my dad was moved to a hospice and I helped to look after him for 2 weeks until the end. My dad's dying wish was to go home and die there, but my mother had hysterics and said no way was he coming home. I did most of his oral care (the cancer had spread to his throat by then and he couldn't swallow) and held the bowl whilst he was sick etc, as you do, all the normal stuff. Whilst my mother sat in the chair by his bed reading.

I have never had the chance to grieve properly for my dad as everything (as usual) has been about her, her feelings etc etc. I tried to tell her on Friday how hard Fathers's Day had been for me this year and she turned it back to herself and how she was feeling. She has never so much as cuddled me once at all.

She lives in Scotland and I am in England, so there is some distance between us. I invited her to come on holiday with the children and me for a week in the summer holidays. Dh has a very busy demanding job and I can't drive, therefore we have organised for dh to drive about 2hrs over to a station where she can get a train directly from her station to this one to save her doing any train changes. It doesn't work on the way back, so dh will drive her to Kings Cross (probably about a 3hr journey there),so she can get the train and get directly off at her home station. Dh is so busy he can only pick her up the day before the holiday and drop her at Kings Cross the day after the holiday.

The reaction to this is - "so I am only getting for a week". I told her it's the only way we can do it without her having to change trains and said we are trying to do the best we possible can for her, then she turned it all into a thing about her, about how she is on her own and has no-one to turn to and why am I being nasty to her!! Despite me saying to her that if she wanted to come before the holiday thats fine but she would need to get her own way here and do the train changes similarily if she wants to stay longer at the end. She did eventually agree she would go with what we had planned for her. But she will more than likely either phone me later or tomorrow and say she is not coming at all. There is never any thanks or slightest bit of gratitude from her. Dh's is dealing with my father's estate, looking after her money and just generally trying to do his best for her and all she does is pick fault with the pair of us.

And sigh.

OP posts:
SoSoMamanBebe · 03/07/2012 17:32

Sorry to hear about your dad. Sad. We can't choose our parents so just try to do what you think you should do with your mum and keep your expectations low.

((hugs)).

IslaValargeone · 03/07/2012 17:41

I think you are just going to have to go through the motions.
I think one of the hardest things about dealing with a dysfunctional parent is that no matter how long they have been behaving badly, part of you thinks that one day, just one day, they might change and you'll have a proper mum.
Well it doesn't happen, so don't expect anything and just toughen up. I think it's the only way.
Sorry about your dad, you and your dh sound lovely. Focus on the fact you have each other.

Fimbo · 03/07/2012 17:46

Thanks, part of my problem is I am an emotional mess and end up crying. I am trying to stop myself though especially in front of her.

OP posts:
SoSoMamanBebe · 03/07/2012 17:51

You're grieving your dad, you're in a perfectly reasonable crying period of your life! Don't let it all be about your mother.

axure · 03/07/2012 17:52

Sorry to hear about your Dad. Accept that nothing you do will ever be good enough for your Mum, but you're doing your best and it's probably a damn sight more than a lot of daughters do. Don't let her get you down.

Ambivalence · 03/07/2012 22:34

Deepest sympathies on the loss of your father, I am sure the way you looked after him at the end was a huge comfort, the grieving will get easier in time.

Abitwobblynow · 03/07/2012 22:53

So sorry to hear about your Dad.

I would say, buy some books on narcissistic parents and learn how to assert yourself. So they will NEVER change, but they can learn to respond to consequences if you stay calm and state the consequences, like a warning state the consequence and then do it, put the phone down /walk away.

Also: please learn to drive. Believe me this is important. It will take the pressure off your DH and make you less dependent. Feel the fear and do it anyway.
PS I am a d of narc parents, driving was an issue for me and I failed many times. I shook w fear, so if I can do it anyone can!

porridgelover · 03/07/2012 23:02

Fimbo I am sorry to hear about your dad. You sound like a wonderful daughter.
He and your mum are lucky to have you.

Your mum wont change and now that she doesnt have your dad to give her the power she needs, she will be looking for another source. Try not to become that.

You know that you are doing the right thing by giving her a holiday. You know that you and your DH are doing the right thing by looking after finances. She doesn't and probably never will see it or acknowledge it.
If you can accept this, it will save you a lot of anguish.

False expectations will only add to your grief.

Fimbo · 04/07/2012 12:44

Thank you so much everyone. I truly must learn not to let her get to me so much. She hasn't phoned so far, but she has a friend coming round today for tea.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/07/2012 14:18

Fimbo

Trying to appeal to a narcissist's better nature and say have a heart is about as effective as spitting in the ocean. They do not have a better nature.

If you have never read the website entitled Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers I would suggest you do so. A book I would suggest you read also is "When you and your mother cannot be friends" written by Rebecca Secunda.

Why did you invite her to visit you all for a week during the summer holidays?. That was never going to work out at all well as you are now seeing and she is not at all appreciative of your efforts. If she cancels the visit, say fine. Unfortunately as you are all too aware, it is not possible to have a relationship with a narcissist as they make it all about them. You are not and have never been that important to her.

BTW she hasn't got friends in the usual sense of the word, the person coming to see her today will be used by your mother as narcissistic supply.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/07/2012 14:21

Would certainly suggest you learn to drive as well. This is a way of giving yourself independence.

I would also suggest you have some counselling regarding the relationship with your dysfunctional mother; BACP are good and do not charge the earth.

You are right re your late Dad's role in all this dysfunction; all narcisstic mothers need an enabling husband. He failed to protect you from her.

Fimbo · 04/07/2012 15:52

I guess Attila I invited her out of a sense of duty rather than anything else. I do feel I need some form of counselling, she phones me at all hours of the day regardless of whether it is something that needs to be dealt with straight away or not. It can be anything up to 4 times a day.

I get things like "I don't know what I ever did to you, maybe something in your childhood to make you the way you are". She thrives on drama and can turn the tears on at the drop of a hat. Of course now my dad has died, it's all about her being on her own, feel sorry for me.

When we go up to Scotland we now stay with my mother in law (the first time was because of a dreadful falling out I had had with her and my father and we need space from them after visiting them). I get hauled over the coals and picked to pieces about this. "All my friends think it's terrible that you don't stay with us, they look at me and go - what, they are not staying with you, how weird". Since my ds came along, there is no where for him to stay at her house. The bedrooms all have fitted in furniture and there is seriously absolutely no room anywhere for him to put a blow up bed down let alone anything else. My mother in law has bags of room for us all. Apparently I am "just making excuses". I find it very hard to have come backs to that, without it ending up in a huge argument.

I will take some lessons in an automatic and see how I get on. Possibly find a job too, so i am not home too much. Although I do now try and not answer the phone to her every time.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/07/2012 16:21

Hi Fimbo

Actually your mother is following the time honoured script that such dysfunctional, narcissist and disordered parents follow.

Many children, now adults, of such toxic parenting have FOG - fear, obligation, guilt.

Do read the book and website I recommended as it could well help you. Would also suggest you post on the "well we took you to Stately Homes" thread that is on this Relationships page.

Can you get Caller ID on your phone so you can screen calls?. She is blatently disregarding any boundary that you set.

Cutting her out completely is likely to be a step too far for you to even begin to contemplate but ultimately it is okay if you wanted to do this. To my mind it is not possible to maintain any sort of relationship with a narcissist.

As also mentioned BACP are good and do not charge the earth.

BerthaTheBogBurglar · 04/07/2012 16:42

I think if she phones and says she isn't coming, you have to try to be supremely unconcerned. "Oh, shame, well you must do what you think best" followed by lots of "mmm" and "aw, never mind" in as abstracted a tone as you can manage. Put the tv on when she phones and just give her half an ear. After 10 minutes you interrupt and say "ooh, someone at the door, speak to you soon" and put the phone down on her.

Would it be so bad if you offended her? When she is getting at you for staying at your MIL's, could you say "we prefer staying with MIL because she doesn't moan at us all the time"? The worst she can do is go off in a huff ...

deste · 04/07/2012 17:21

I agree, if she says she can't go just call her bluff and tell her not to worry about it, maybe next year.

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