I would like to get the pospective from others on a siutation with a friend I have know for 23 years.
Last year I discovered having booked a holiday with my family, DP his 3 kids myself and my DS, it turned out we were overlapping with some other friends at the same resort for 3 of our 7 night stay. Great I thought, however once there I found them to be distant and on the 2nd to last day of our overlap we all did a boat trip together where they hardly spoke to us all day and then once we arrived back at the resort on the coach they all literally ran off the coach without saying a word, later my DP took the kids to go down to the bar whilst i finished getting ready only to bump into all of them about to jump in taxis to go to the town to eat, one friend embarassingly came up to him once she noticed he spotted them and akwardly said they were going to the town to eat etc etc but it was all very cloak and dagger. I couldnt understand what or why they would do this and made the desicion the next day to go to a theme park and just avoid their last day.
On our return from holiday nothing was said and I chose to keep my distance, i couldnt believe what had happened and was confused to why and to be honest felt i didnt really want to bother anymore. Some 6 months later one of them asked to meet for a coffee to explain, i went along and was shocked for her to say it was because my DP's eldest was considered a bad influence on their kid the same age and generally slated my DP (and i guess mine) parenting style. I could not be believe what i was hearing, DPs oldest in an A grade student, never had issues with drinking,smoking staying out not knowing where he is etc, she basically claimed that because his curfew was later than theres it caused arguments, also he was over heard swearing (jesus what 15 year old doesnt with his mates) but the insinuation that we condone that was shocking. The conversation was awful and by no means cleared the air. She claimed that DP eldest had bragged to the other kids he can come in whe he likes and we are asleep so have no clue etc, I told her that what teenager doesnt brag, does that make it true 'NO' that never happens and once we go back with the younger kids and are then ready to call it a night DP texts him to tell him to come in (he is only downstairs playing pool on the resport)
I just dont know what to fathom about it, I have cut myself off from her and the others and some of my other friends (we were a large group going back many years) have distanced themselves too
I always believe in trying to wear the other boot to see it from someone elses side but i just can not see why they thought behaiving like this was the best, it was clicky and reminded me of being at youth club why didnt they just speak to me or DP at the time, knowing me 23 years they know my parenting style and who I am. It was soo personel and opinionated and hurt me an awful lot.
Sorry to ramble on