I've been with my boyfriend for a few months. He did all the chasing at the start (I wasn't too keen on him to begin with) but I gave him a chance and grew to really like him - love him, even.
We've had some ups and downs along the way:
I was in an abusive relationship previously (one where I was emotionally abused, raped, stalked and blackmailed) and I am having difficulty trusting him. I always suspect he's going to do something to take advantage of me. We had a huge fight one evening where he said I had embarrassed him as I had been loud after drinking. I drunkenly told him to f*ck off out of my house - I knew it was wrong, apologised profusely and found a therapist to get the therapy I very much need (for myself rather than 'us') BF doesn't believe in therapy though, so I feel my efforts are being trampled on anyway.
He also doesn't like it when I disagree with him on subjects (we work in the same profession, we are smart people, of course we will disagree). He believes I'm being deliberately contrary just to wind him up (funnily enough he said that one of the things that annoyed him about his ex was that she agreed with him too much!)
We were once at a restaurant on holiday and I asked him if he could turn his chair to face me and talk as he was facing the sun and I said it was impolite to just be sat there topping up his tan. From this he hasn't been able to let it drop - apparently I'm 'vindictive and spiteful'. When I call him up on his behaviour (like flirting with a colleague of ours all evening, prompting me to walk off) he says I'm just doing a 'tit for tat' thing.
We had some space from one another and I saw him this week. I thought things were ok, but in the back of my mind, my gut was telling me something wasn't right. I asked what was wrong and he said he doesn't know whether he can move on from me telling him to f-off. He said he wanted space, well no, he actually said he can't stand to be around me at the moment.
So that's that. He dropped me off at my house, he's now at his friend's house watching the football, I'm devastated, my mum is coming to stay with me.
I know I'm worthy of love and affection and I can't believe I have gone from the man who fell in love with me and wrote me poetry to someone who almost hates me. I feel like I've done it all myself.
The worst thing is that a friend of mine who I have known for years secretly liked me and was asking friends if they thought a long-distance relationship would work (we live almost 4 hours apart) but in the same week that he came down to see me to tell me of his feelings - I had got into a relationship with this other guy.
Does anyone have any words of wisdom or advice? Can relationships really survive space, or is he just putting off the inevitable?